WELCOME TO NEXUS.

[CT_Colossus]

***CMF: Limbo***

Listening from the crowd Piotr didn't know if he had found a more uncomfortable place since he wasn't a person used to this environment. Having come from a farming family without the means to send him to such a place himself the closest he'd ever gotten to a University education before this was what he had learned within his time as an X-man. Even then he hadn't really taken a whole lot of formal classes, most of the things that he learned were through experience since he had led a mostly fast paced lifestyle compared to what he would have had if he had decided not to go with Charles Xavier when he had come to Piotr's farm. That seemed to have been so very long ago, and he had been nervous initially, but had found that the experiences helped to build him as a person. He felt stronger because of what he had been through, and he was reminded once again of all of the good times when he saw Charles Xavier step out to start his presentation. It felt awkward for him to be in a suit but he felt it better to be more formal at such an occasion and he was quickly lost in Professor Xavier's presentation so he didn't think of anything else for a good period of time.

At the end of the presentation he found himself reflecting on what the man had said, and almost as much he found his memories drifting to what had been. Even given everything though he had gone against his deepest instincts it seemed but that was mostly due to anger, and a profound sense of loss at his sister's death. He quickly turned his thoughts away from that as he felt his fist clench and he knew that if he thought to hard on it there may be tears that would threaten to fall. It was still hard to think of though it had been a good period of time. Since then though he had betrayed his oldest friends and he still felt a hint of doubt if they would even accept him back. Part of him had always missed them, and since the fall of Avalon and spending time with the Morlock's he reflected on the sense of camaraderie they seemed to have and it reminded him of the last remaining people who could probably be considered his family, the X-men. Yes, he had betrayed them, but at the same time it was because at the time he felt the beliefs of Magneto were more suited to how the world worked. The questions to Xavier's dream spurred by Illyana and his parents death had been that great.

Looking around he realized that the crowd was moving around him since he had started his internal reflection before he'd exited the auditorium after Xavier had finished. A week or so past he had finally given in and instead of trying to visit the X-mansion directly he sought a less discreet means of communication and had sent a letter to the professor. They had agreed to meet up at this conference and it was something that made Piotr once again reminisce his first meeting. Unlike then when the professor had come asking for his help he knew that this was his way of asking to be forgiven. It was one thing if the professor rejected him, he didn't believe that he would be able to return to Magneto, their beliefs truly were that much different. He respected the other mutant, and felt that there were some positive aspects to his beliefs. But there were to many actions, and to many twists to the beliefs that Piotr didn't feel agreed with his own. He eventually found himself approaching the pre-determined meeting area for Xavier and found that he was keeping the other man waiting. He bowed his head and said, "Professor, that was a very well delivered presentation and I am honored I was able to attend."

That was a little forced he knew, but he wasn't sure how to start since there were so many things that he wanted to say how to say them wasn't coming to mind. If the professor looked even at the surface of the mind he might see once again the large Russian thinking about what had been, and he hoped maybe someday could be again. He wasn't sure how Xavier or anyone else could forgive him for going over to the Acolytes, damaging Bishop while aiding in Magneto's escape, and his many actions as part of the Acolytes. They had even tried to help save him and he had rejected their offer for help but now he found didn't try to hide any part of his heart or mind. He wanted the professor to know fully well how he felt, and all he could say while keeping his head bowed was a very quiet,"I am so very sorry..."

[//Professor X]

[Day One]

Professor Charles Francis Xavier, Psychologist and Geneticist, was more than the leader of the X-Men intent on waging a silent war against enemies of Humanity. At various times he made public appearances, even scheduled ongoing routine visits to academic institutions or other public venues. Many times he'd involved himself in Federal and State hearings on matters related to the "Mutant Issue." He was anything but a recluse; though his focus did tend to deal overwhelmingly with topics surrounding mutants and interactions with mutants. Given the widespread misconceptions he took it as a personal responsibility to raise public awareness of how to deal with young mutants and that they could live together in peace.

Xavier smiled as he listened to one of the attendees comment on a few confusing subjects from the presentation. Hands folded in his lap, the Professor was attentive and polite until the questions were asked. He replied calmly, working to provide not only an answer, but a framework for the student to investigate further on their own after they left the room. Answers were easy even when they were wrong. It was easy to come across as an authority on a subject giving the person the impression there wasn't room for debate; Charles did his best to avoid giving that impression while still conveying the strength of his position (as people tended to dismiss arguments from people they perceived as 'weak' or 'uncertain').

As the last person drifted out, the Professor's eyes lingered at the door before he slowly turned to the Russian that slowly approached. Far as anyone else in the auditorium had been concerned he'd been just another attendee. Matters they didn't need to know. "Piotr." Charles smiled just for a moment before he reached over and slid his book off the table and back into his lap. "Escort me outside?"

Well if the man was here to make amends, it only seemed opportunistically beneficial for the man to demonstrate his new-found position and, likewise, for Xavier to demonstrate a certain amount of trust that Piotr wouldn't slam his chair into a wall or down stairs.

"It has been a while, Piotr. You look healthy. If I may ask, what brings you here?" And by 'here' Xavier meant to him, not to this physical location. After all the Russian had seemingly made a decision a few months ago. Something had changed? Charles was also interested in what may have happened with Magneto, but he wouldn't get ahead of himself.

This post has been edited by //Professor X on Jul 8 2012, 07:57 PM

[CT_Colossus]

It had been probably a week ago that he finally had gotten up the nerve to contact Professor Charles Xavier. He wasn't sure but wouldn't doubt that the powerful telepath knew he was back in town if he had been looking for him at all. But at the same time he couldn't be sure because he had fallen from grace to put it simply as much as he would like to. His life seemed to be empty, he had lost his brother, parents, sister, and then he lost Katya. It wasn't' just Katya, but he had been an X-man for years, before his last loss had been to much for him. It wasn't something that he felt good for, caving like that, and more importantly taking out Bishop in a battle made it so he really didn't like the thought of how that interaction may end up going. No matter the case just like he had said in his letter he had sent, even though it had been hard enough for him to think of what to say. Sorry wasn't a stretch for him to say unlike some people he knew, but at the same time he didn't feel that would have been sufficient. Even after he had left he'd not felt ready when they had tried to reach the olive branch to him of sorts, but at that point he had found that he wasn't able to leave the Acolytes at this point.

After the fall though he had spent time with the Morlocks, and traveling the world with the money he was able to earn on his own. It was during this time that he was able to truly come to terms with what he had done, what he was missing, and finally he was able to come to the realization of what he truly felt in his heart. When he heard Xavier speak he was reminded one more time for easily the hundredth time while he had been in New York for the past few weeks of why he should try to approach his former friend and mentor. The man was eloquent as always and his words truly did remind Piotr of why he had gone with him years ago when he'd been approached. Seeing the man as he approached he felt a sense of enjoyment seeing he was still in good health, and yet a sense of dread because he wasn't looking forward to the trials that he was sure to follow if he wanted to try reintegrating himself as an X-man. It was truly something he wished to do eventually, though he knew he had some bridges to repair before he got to that point. Piotr felt himself questioning how it would go from the moment Xavier addressed him but he wasn't going to close himself and kept himself open, he nodded and said, "It is good to see you Professor. That was a wonderful presentation," Moving behind him he gently put his hands on the other mans chair as he responded to his invitation to escort him outside, "It would be my pleasure."

Xavier wasn't one to beat around the bush normally, and Piotr wasn't one to really try to lie or give false meaning to his words, especially right now. There were a few ways that his line could have been interpreted but he wasn't going to try guessing it was anything other than what he started to respond, "I would be lying if I didn't say that I'm surprised I'm here as soon as I am, and yet also surprised it took this long." That was completely true, he had been going back and forth for a bit but wasn't about to lose his nerve and he said, "I think one of the easiest ways to say why I'm here is that I was hoping that you could help me in a way similar to how you came to ask me for help years ago." That was partially true, yet at the same time profoundly different and he continued, "My actions of late would not speak towards that but after the fall I found myself finally coming to my senses, and was hoping that I might find a way to show you that I haven't been completely lost." He mentally kicked himself, his thoughts may have been clear what he was trying to say but he found the presence of Xavier to be more daunting than he thought. He bowed his head and mumbled quietly, "I have come back to the place that is closer to home for me anywhere in this world, but am unsure that I have the right or ever will have the right to call it my home again, no matter how much I may wish it."

That was probably the closest he could get to speaking aloud his thoughts as he tried to leave the door open in case the other man wanted to look for further details. Especially at the moment, Piotr Rasputin had nothing to hide, he felt he had nothing to lose since at the moment he was still lost, and everything to gain if he was given even the slimmest of chances to try for the road of redeeming himself.

[//Professor X]

Xavier remain silent as Piotr spoke and slowly wheeled the Professor down the hall. The Russian obviously had something on his mind, so there was no point interrupting until the other man managed to say it. From the sound of things Piotr's thoughts were well organized as it was; an interruption would only throw the man into a state of chaos. Seeing how he finally came to a point, in relatively short order, there wasn't any risk of him rambling for minutes on end like a nervous school boy. Fortunate, seeing how Piotr had never been a nervous chatter box before; it would be unfortunate to see him start now.

"Piotr," Charles turned his head to the side, "tell me why you made the decision, and what you did from when you made that decision three months ago until today." Now was not the time for speeches. How could Xavier possibly make a decision or expect others to make a decision from a mere statement of change? The sincerity was there, but sincerity alone did not heal wounds. As the head of his own estate Charles needed wounds to heal; he needed his own house in order if he expected to clean up the world's mess.

There'd be time for speeches soon enough. Observations and thoughts Xavier had from what Piotr had said already. More, however, would make this transition smoother; and it would prepare the man for the awkward and uncomfortable moments ahead if he expected to stand face to face with those he saw in space. The Professor needed to know the man had his story straight and wasn't simply winging it nervously as he went trying for the heart-felt originality of the moment. There was time for that, but if he stumbled over a question like "why did you do it?" inevitably someone would take him to task. The X-Men had enough trouble from external threats, they did not need animosity between one another--any more than what already existed on some level.

Out front sat the Professor's limousine ready to carry him back to the mansion. A hired driver sat in the driver's seat patiently awaiting the man's return at the scheduled time. Fortunately, there was plenty of room for Piotr to join him if they arrived before the Russian's story had concluded and the Professor rendered an answer.

[CT_Colossus]

Pushing the professor through the hall Piotr tried to think of what things had been like rather than how things could be, or could have been. Just as with painting he couldn't afford right now to simply assume that things would appear as he expected them, as even someone such as he who had spent years with a paintbrush there was always human error. It wasn't always a bad thing, and he hoped that the fact that he had learned from his prior mistakes he hoped that it would assist him with the trials he would face going forward. He tried to organize what he was going to say before he said them since he didn't see any point in trying to waste the short time they had allotted to go off track. He awaited the professors response to what he had said so far patiently, Another trait that he had for most of his life taken advantage of though he was as prone as any other person to losing his patience and making decisions rashly. He listened to the professors question and thought about it for a moment before he nodded and said briefly, "As usual Professor you have proven well your ability to with few words ask the most penetrating questions."

That truth wasn't lost on him but he had spent enough time in praising him for the moment, since he hadn't sent the professor his letter to ask his presence just so that he could praise him. That wasn't something he felt the professor expected either so with that in mind he started with the obvious "I would say that regrettably that decision was made rashly in the throes of loss, and though that is true it is but an excuse." He thought on that for a moment easily seeing once again the last images he had seen of his sister, before her death, they were burned into his memory. The sickness that had caused her to lose her life was one that they had yet to cure, and that wasn't lost on him. He nodded and said, "I felt at that moment and still do feel that Magneto has a strong sense of purpose, and in the recent history of the moment I felt as if maybe I was looking from the wrong prospective myself, I had lost my sense of purpose and being so I felt that I didn't understand myself enough and he had offered me a new outlook." That was all true, and he just had to hope that his old mentor, friend, and the person closest to a father he had left in this world wouldn't take offense. It wasn't his intention to say that Xavier's dream was lost to him or he felt it any less viable but he let the last line slip out, "I was weak and so I went with him searching for a new sense of purpose which I felt was lost with the loss of my little snowflake."

Already he had said more than he liked so he tried to think of a way to reflect his thoughts thinking how much easier this might be if the professor would simply read his thoughts then again it would only be a temporary reprieve. If he wasn't able to explain things to the professor than what right did he truly have in trying to return to the X-men? What had he learned in his time away he started quietly but by the third word was talking confidently, "I have learned the importance of relying on your own heart and beliefs than others. Over the past few months I have spent it going around to various places and helping others with blood, sweat, with and without my powers. I feel that I have been able to look into my heart and understand it better than I have before." It was true, he had seen people who had dealt with more than him and handled it much better, and best of all had stayed true to themselves. He shook his head and muttered, "I not only betrayed the X-men that had been my family, but I betrayed my own beliefs and my own heart."

The words and thoughts weren't the easiest to think of or to cope with but he had dealt with a lot in his life and he truly felt he was stronger now than he had been before. Maybe not physically, but he had always believed that there was more important things in this life than physical strength. As they got nearer to the professors ride to the mansion Piotr figured it was about time for this meeting to come to an end, so he spoke once more, "I would understand if you feel we need to have another meeting or if you would rather I didn't come back. Just know I am stronger than I was and understand more than ever the importance of following what you believe, and even more so than when you found me years ago my belief in trying to uphold your dream of peace between mutants and humans is of utmost importance. I couldn't resist the pull of returning to the place that has felt more of a home to me than anyplace else."

He brought the professor and was prepared to offer him assistance getting into his vehicle as needed while awaiting the professor's response. Either way Piotr would respect the mans thoughts, opinions, and decision.

This post has been edited by CT_Colossus on Jul 14 2012, 05:32 PM

[//Professor X]

The Professor slowly rose from his chair, accepting Piotr's help to shift into the backseat of the limo as the driver came around to take care of storing the wheelchair itself. He hadn't said a word until a few seconds had passed as he sat in the doorway, eyes forward. Then the bald man turned his head slowly to look back at the towering Russian beside his vehicle. "You will never find a more important lesson, Piotr, than learning who you are. If you do not know who you are, others will set your course for you. You have no power greater than self-determination."

Xavier sat for just a moment before adding, "I cannot dictate how others will respond, but I can give you a second chance, Piotr, if you are ready." One of the powers of self-determination was forgiveness; whether people accepted him and forgave him was out of Charles' control. Well, ethically out of his control. Even if he forced someone to change their mind, however, Xavier still believed the underlying truth remained and could resurface with help--telepathy was not hemmed in the garments of gods, it merely dressed itself well.

Slowly Charles slid deeper into the limo to make room for Piotr to join him. "I would be glad to have you return home." It would be out of character for Xavier to abandon someone, especially given how often he hoped Magneto would create "Utopia" peacefully; if that was possible given his long history in the public's eye. Colossus was also a strong man and still had much value to contribute toward protecting others and building the new world. He only hoped Piotr would regain some of his confidence and self-worth over time; as it was his humility in the face of embarrassment ran deep. Too deep in some respect, but Piotr could rebound. Some friendly faces would no doubt help in that regard.

He'd wait until Piotr got in or chose to walk away before signally the driver to get them underway back to the mansion. The sidewalk really wasn't the best place for deep or meaningful conversations; Xavier just wanted to leave it open for Piotr to change his mind if he suddenly felt returning to the mansion was a bad idea after expressing what must have been troubling him for some time.

[TBC: Mansion, Main Level Living Area: "From Afar"]

This post has been edited by //Professor X on Jul 23 2012, 09:50 PM

[CT_Colossus]

Waiting wasn’t ever really fun, and considering one of the options could be getting turned away from his adoptive home though he didn’t want to think about that. Even if that was the case, he was honest when he said It, and believed it whole heartedly. Given time he hoped that one way or another whether from inside the walls of the mansion, or without he could prove to his former friends and comrades that he was able to be trusted again. Even after all he had been through, it wasn’t that he didn’t distrust Magneto, but he had come to realize that his way of viewing things was different at basically every level to his own. It wasn’t just Xavier’s dream but it was what Piotr Rasputin believed completely. He waited patiently as he helped the professor into his limo and noticed that the driver put the wheelchair away. As soon as the professor spoke, Piotr found his attention drawn back to the professor as soon as he started speaking again as was usual.

While he thought about what the professor said he found himself thinking about just how peaceful it could be to listen to the professor. He thought about what he said, and he wondered if that might be one reason that he was here because he could only think of how some people would react to his attempt at returning. The next line he said was one that he was relieved to hear and yet he understood completely that there was truth in the last few words. His initial instinct was that he had was ready for anything that may come. Partially that may be true, but he knew what some of the people were capable of and also he had no doubt he had hurt some of them. He was most worried for a moment about some of his closest, though he didn’t believe that defending himself physically would be his worry. Physical pain would heal, so would emotional or mental, but those were the hardest to heal, and no matter what he knew he would have an uphill battle.

The question wasn’t IF he was ready, it was more of would he rather jump in head first, or try to just walk in slowly from the outside in. He wasn’t normally one to simply rush headlong into things, well, unless someone he knew was in danger or potential danger. To say he would take the proverbial bullet was putting it lightly. So it was with that inmind that after the professor said that he’d be glad to have Piotr return home that he smiled with more heartfelt joy than he had since before Illyana died and he said, ”I would be honored to have this opportunity.” One of his first thoughts he found coming to the forefront of his mind was Katya. She was one of the people he feared seeing most but at the same time he felt himself wishing he could see her right this moment. As the door shut he spoke one more thought he hoped to clarify before he got back to the place he hoped to call home once again once he’d earned the right, ”I wanted to make sure before we arrived, are there any changes you feel you can trust me with that you may be able to let me know about, and anything I may be able to assist with that may help me earn the right to someday call the mansion home once more?”

***Exit: Piotr, TBC: ADMIN EDIT: Xavier's Mansion // Living Area // From Afar***