`TANP, TTOOO

[audrey hazel cooper]

It was a Sunday, and Audrey Cooper was in the library. Why? You'd think she'd be outside with her peers, not inside the stuffy library, listening to Madam Pince tell off some third years for dueling in the Potions section and blowing up half the shelves. However, outside the castle, it was pouring rain. It was actually almost as if the heavens had opened up and some higher being had just taken a huge pail of water and dumped it on the castle and the grounds. ...And then decided to throw in some thunder and lightening for effect. Personally, Audrey never liked thunder or lightning. She'd always been rather scared of the combination, and had been known to cower in her mother's bed whenever a rain storm had taken place. Of course, now that she was at school and her mother and said bed were miles away, that option wasn't really an option at all. So Audrey sat at a table in the library, biting down on her bottom lip with her eyebrows pulled together as she tried to concentrate on Quidditch Through The Ages.

Why she was even reading Quidditch Through The Ages, Audrey didn't know. On the way to the back of the library she'd just kind of grabbed a book off a random shelf without even looking at it. Of course, now that she was stuck reading about something she was sure was called the Wonky Faint, the blond Ravenclaw was sort of beginning to regret the whole 'Grab and Go' thing. Then again, maybe if she actually liked Quidditch, things would be a bit easier. Or even if she was willing to learn about the sport. But no. She was Audrey Hazel Cooper, and she liked the ground. Therefore, since she had no intention of ever playing the sport, she was pretty damn sure there was absolutely no good reason for her to read about Wonky Faints and Bludgers.

Running a hand through her long blond hair, Audrey let out a sigh, and turned the page. Ah, okay, this was better. A picture of England's Quidditch team in the locker room, half naked players and all. However, her enjoyment was cut short as a particularly loud clash on thunder sounded outside the window Audrey was beside, causing her to nearly jump out of her skin, or at least almost fall out of her chair. Holding a hand to her chest, the blond steadied her breathing, cursing the rain storm that was raging outside under her breath the entire time. Finally, Audrey went back to her book, flipping the page as she bit back down on her bottom lip again, a clear sign of her obvious discomfort with the whole rain storm situation.

[landon jacob winchester]

Landon Jacob Winchester was no Peeping Tom, or Peeping Jacob. Whatever. He wasn't, he didn't spy on people, and he didn't people watch. But that dreary afternoon he found himself watching his friend, and ex-love-of-his-life. It had started out like any other normal, rainy day. He had come to the library to get out of his common room and away from his housemates, needing to get some homework done. Well, all had been going well until she had come in. He had been coming along on his essay rather nicely, nearly finished. There was just something he was missing and he had gotten up in search of a book to help him finish his essay.

That was when he had spotted her; looking over some book. Landon didn't know what it was, he didn't really care. The point was, she was there, in the library, and Landon could have so easily gone over to her and started a conversation. But his heart was beating to fast in his chest, and he couldn't breathe properly. No need to go over to her and scare the holy crap out of her. What an impression that would make! He sighed softly and surpressed a laugh as she fell out of her chair at a particularly loud clap of thunder.

Landon knew Audrey wasn't a fan of thunderstorms. She never had been. He'd often wake up to find her sneaking into his room when a thunderstorm happened in the middle of the night. And Landon, being the good boyfriend he was, would hold her and whisper soothing words in her ear till her breathing evened out and she slipped into a peaceful sleep. Those memories made Landon's heart ache for her, and he tried his best to clear his head. He wanted to talk to Audrey, and he was going to; as soon as he pulled himself together.

Once he had decided he was alright and could breathe alright, he moved from behind the stack of books; the book he needed in hand. He looked down at her, wishing things were as they once were. He could hold her and comfort her, but not now. He was her friend, and the holding thing was off limits, unless she was crying; he guessed. "Hey Aud. You doing okay?" Landon asked as he moved one of the chairs away from the table and sat down. Without realizing it, his eyes held a type of fondness in them, and the look was one he had only ever given Audrey. And sometimes, without realizing it, he looked at her that way; looked at her the way he was looking at her now.

[audrey hazel cooper]

Quidditch. Pleh. Audrey hated Quidditch. Okay, no, that was a lie. She just didn't like the whole heights thing too much. She'd dropped Astronomy as soon as she had been able to because it had required her to be in the tallest tower of the castle in the middle of the night, where it was much too easy to just kind of... fall to your death. The Quidditch stands were even worse. Despite the fact she didn't mind watching Quidditch too much, she rather enjoyed the view from the ground as opposed to the one that was a hundred feet in the air. Honestly, what was the deal with the huge stands? The students of Hogwarts always got rowdy during the games, so how was it that nobody had yet fallen out of the stands? A miracle, Audrey was sure.

Of course, she'd been dragged up to the stands numerous times to watch practices. Izzie had been known to pull her up there from time to time to boy watch, as most of the house teams were made up of almost only boys, of whom thought it was fun to show off whenever they knew they had an audience. Then again, she had been known to go up there by her own free will, now and then. Those times were long gone though, Audrey noted dully as she let out a soft sigh and flipped the page of her book. The only times she'd ever gone up there without being dragged was whenever the Ravenclaw team had practiced. Landon had been on the Ravenclaw team. Landon had been worth facing her fear for, if only for an hour or so at a time.

At that thought, Landon appeared from behind a bookshelf and took a seat at her table, at which point Audrey looked up and closed her book, glad for a distraction that would actually work. The blond shrugged lightly, mulling over her answer for a moment before speaking. "Some what. Better now you're here." This was, of course, true. However, she supposed it wasn't exactly appropriate. "Glad for the distraction," Audrey added, sending him a small smile as she waved a hand towards her book. "Quidditch Through The Ages wasn't exactly doing a great job." Oh, dear. He was giving her the look. That look of absolute... fondness, and adoration, that seemed able to make her heart skip a beat at the drop of a hat. Damn him and his look.

She was lost. Lost, lost, lost, in his look. How someone was able to achieve such a look, Audrey had absolutely no idea. But she sure as hell wasn't going to argue. No siree. When someone, especially someone you'd spent the better part of your adolescence in love with and was still probably in love with, looked at you the way Landon was looking at Audrey, you didn't exactly question it. And as far as the whole love thing went, well, she was pretty damn positive that there were a fair few feelings flooding back to her now that he was looking at her like that again. Which was rather inconvenient, actually. "How about you? How're you?"

[landon jacob winchester]

Landon couldn't help the smile that appeared as she said things were better because he was there. Whatever way she meant it didn't matter, it was just the fact she had said it at all. "Right." Landon said as he looked toward her book. Wow, so either she was seriously just reading whatever these days or she was genuinely interested in Quidditch. Okay, well he highly doubted the latter of the two thoughts. "Yeah, I wouldn't think so. You don't even relly like Qudditch." Landon had always thought Aud's need to stay on the ground was endearing. And he used to love the fact she would come see him during his practices. Just the fact she would suffer sitting high up in the stands for him, was something he deeply appreciated.

It was then a thought struck him; Landon hadn't seen Audrey around very often. He used to see her every night in the common room, but as of late, he only ever really saw her at meals. That thought made him frown slightly. They used to see each other every day, stopping to say 'hello' every once in a while. And conversations were now few and far between. What had happened to them? Oh right, they had broken up. And being with friends with someone you had once truly loved was always a little difficult. There were things you wanted to do that you just couldn't anymore. He inwardly sighed before looking back at Audrey.

"Oh, I've been alright." He shrugged his shoulders. "Homework and Quidditch have kind of been my main priorities as of late." Landon carded his fingers through his dirty blond hair before looking out the window at the downpour; instead of showing any signs of stopping, it only seemed to become more harsh. "How have you been? It's been a while since we've talked." He admitted, wondering what the reason were for that. He was sure it was both of their faults, but Landon couldn't think of a reason why; maybe it was instinct. One did tend to shy away from the things that hurt, it was only human nature.

[audrey hazel cooper]

How was it like, legal, for someone to be that....beautiful. It was just... irritating. Okay, no. The fact that Landon was pretty was not irritating. It was nice. He was nice to look at. The thing that was irritating was that Audrey could no longer tell him he was pretty. She couldn't pull him into a dark corner of the library and, well, do what they used to do. She couldn't hold his hand. She couldn't kiss him. She couldn't seek him out in the middle of the night and crawl into bed with him, and listen to his soothing words. She couldn't let him hold her. They couldn't do any of those things anymore. Not now, after everything that had happened between them. Not now that they were broken up.

The reason hadn't even made much sense, after all. They'd been scared. Scared of the way they made each other feel. Scared of the pure... love, that they felt for each other. Surely something like that wasn't normal. Surely nobody else felt that way during their teen years. Surely they were just swept up in hormones. Landon and Audrey were both extremely cautious people. Okay, well, maybe not extremely cautious, but cautious. The idea of feeling what they felt for each other and the possibility of doing something rash or foolish because of it wasn't exactly something either of them were too comfortable with. What if they ended up hating each other in twenty years, lost in a loveless marriage, living in a house that was falling apart, with a bunch of kids? What then?

"I do too like Quidditch!" Audrey defended stubbornly, sitting up a bit straighter in her chair. "I just like the ground better." She knew it sounded like the most ridiculous thing ever. She knew, because even she was having trouble not letting out a small laugh afterwards. The blond nodded in understanding at Landon's words. "Yeah. Me too. I've been okay. Kinda plain, you know? Just, you know, getting by. Reading. Studying. Talking to Izzie and everything. Plain." Audrey shrugged lightly before she spoke again. "Seventh year, huh? Soon we'll be off to the real world, as Snape put it. Off to fend for our immature selves, I believe was the quote. We'll probably be off to opposite sides of the country, maybe even the continent." Audrey looked sadly out the window at this. Did she really want to say goodbye to Landon at the end of the year, for what could very well be forever? No. She didn't. But there wasn't much she could do about it, was there? No.

Tearing her gaze from the window, her blue orbs fell on the boy, the man, across from her. Audrey studied him for a long moment, reviewing the idea in her mind. Forever. Never again to see Landon Winchester. Despite the fact being his friend was probably the hardest thing she'd ever done, Audrey sure as hell would rather that than not see him at all. "Hey, Landon?" The blond began tentatively, "We'll keep in touch after school, right? It's not going to be goodbye for forever when we leave the station, is it?" She didn't like the thought of that. Not at all. Looking down, Audrey played with her hands on the table for a moment, not really knowing where to look. What if he wanted to say goodbye forever at the station? What then?

[landon jacob winchester]

Landon watched as Audrey began to look a little far off. He knew that face so well; hell, he knew all of Audrey's faces as if they were his own. He wondered what she was thinking. His blue eyes looked over her, watching her carefully. She was perfect, beautiful, gorgeous, and all of those types of adjectives. She was the epitome of everything Landon could ever truly want. And damn if Landon still didn't want her. Landon thought back to their break up; it just seemed stupid to him now. They had a love most people would die for. It was true, it was pure, it was special, and Landon missed it more than anything. He noticed a small strand of Audrey's hair had fallen out of place, and without really thinking, he reached over and gently tucked it back into place.

"Mhm. I know you only ever came out to the Pitch to see me." Landon teased. It was to either watch him, or boy watch with Izzie; either way. "I know you do, I know you do." He assured her with a small grin. Plain? He didn't like hearing that. He hadn't been leading an exciting life either, but for Audrey to say her life was plain made Landon frown. Plain and Audrey Hazel Cooper was not a fitting combination. "What's been going on that you'd need to just be getting by?" Landon asked, tilting his head slightly. Was something wrong? For a second, Landon thought that maybe she was trying to get by without him, but he mentally shook his head. Landon and Audrey had been broken up for a while; the time for dealing was way over. He didn't like the direction the conversation had turned. "Hey, don't think like that. You never know, maybe we'll go into the same field and still be together." Who really knew what the future held for them?

"Yeah, Aud?" Landon noted the hesitation in Aud's voice and looked at her, giving her his full attention. "Yeah, of course we will. You're my best friend." And the love of my life. Like I could ever be too far away from you. He wanted to say. "I'll only be an owl away, you know that." Was what he said instead. "Hey, but don't worry about it now. We've got the rest of this school year. It's only just started, remember? Let's just enjoy it." He tried to be encouraging, but her questions had him thinking. What would the pair do once they left school? What if they really never saw each other again? Merlin, he hoped that never happened; he didn't think he could deal with that. The distance between them now was kililng him, but actual physical distance? He couldn't deal with that, he knew he couldn't.

[audrey hazel cooper]

Audrey watched Landon as he reached over and tucked a piece of her hair back into place. Oh, geeze. It was the small touches like this that made things that much harder for her to accept. The breakup itself was stupid, now that she thought about it. Who broke up over something as stupid as that? Seriously. Audrey mentally smacked herself on the back of the head. It was ridiculous. Of course, now there wasn't much to be done, now was there? No. There wasn't. For all she knew, he could have moved on by now. Found himself a new girlfriend that didn't always have her nose in a book. She'd tried to find a replacement for Landon, but it'd been impossible. The only person that had come close to working was Derek Parker, but Audrey hadn't seen him for weeks, so lord knew that obviously wasn't going to work out. It'd been a stupid thought, anyway. Her and Parker? He was a Slytherin. Landon was much better suited for her. He was a Ravenclaw. He understood her. He didn't purposely try to drive her to edge of her patience just for his own amusement.

"You're awful full of yourself over there, Mr Winchester." Audrey shook her head, a small smirk playing at her lips as she watched him grin back at her. He was, of course, right. He'd been the only reason she'd ever gone up there willingly. Even when she'd gone with Izzie, there'd been a bit of hesitation on her part. But when she went up there for Landon... Well, it didn't feel so scary. And he'd periodically check on her throughout the practice, to make sure she was alright, which was really sweet. Landon just had a way of making everything bad seem not as scary as it did otherwise. At his question, she shrugged lightly, and looked out the window in time for the lightning to streak across the sky and a particularly loud clap of thunder to sound. Lovely. The blond felt herself bring her chair closer to Landon's as she replied, her voice shaking slightly from the fear of the storm that raged just outside the castle. "Nothing. I didn't mean it like that. I just meant, you kno- Okay. Is the thunder louder now or is it just me?" Audrey stood up leaned towards the window, peering out cautiously. The reply to her question came a few moments later when the thunder sounded again, sending her back into her chair like a four year old.

The blond nodded at Landon's words, trying to bring her attention back down to him, instead of what was going on outside. "No, yeah, you're right. No use worrying about it now." Audrey looked up at him after a few seconds, smiling slightly. "I'm your best friend, huh? You must not get out much, babe." She elbowed him lightly, before realizing what exactly she'd called him. Ah, well. There was no use taking it back now. It was out, and acting like she regretted saying it would only make things awkward. "Yeah," Audrey agreed. "It's only just started. It'll be a good year, I think." Well, that was, if you didn't take the whole being broken up thing into account, she supposed.

[landon jacob winchester]

"Well, naturally." Landon agreed. "I'm a Winchester after all. We are full of ourselves, amazingly attractive, and somewhat stubborn." Landon went on. So, maybe that was somewhat true. He wasn't all that full of himself, he was pretty attractive, and he had been prone to a few fits of stubborness. But that was close enough to the truth, he supposed. He knew plenty of people who were more full of themselves; namely the Slytherins, not that he knew them on a personal level.

Landon was struggling with controlling the feeling of laugher bubbling in his chest. Though he thought her fear of thunderstorms was adorable, as was she, it also was somewhat amusing. On pure instict, he reached out and placed a hand gently on her arm upon hearing the shaking in her voice; attempting to comfort her. More than anything he wanted to hold her, but he knew that was beyond inappropriate now. "It's probably because you're by a window Aud." Landon pointed out. "We can move if that would make you feel better." He offered, wanting her to be comfortable and not so afraid. It was when she darted back to her chair that Landon had to let out a small, nearly inaudible chuckle; he couldn't help it.

"Yeah. I mean, everything will work itself out, you'll see." He said in an attempt to once again reassure her. He liked seeing her smile, and knowing he was the one making her do it only made him feel better. A smile appeared on his face as she called him babe. Merlin, did he ever miss that. "Well, you've always been my best friend. Before and after..." But he trailed off of that, the words broke up lingering in the air. Landon couldn't say those words, he could think them, sure, but say them? "It will be." He told her, with yet another smile. He found it easier to smile now that he was around her, despite the topic of conversation.

[audrey hazel cooper]

Audrey shook her head, laughing quietly as Landon spoke. "Oh, you are, are you? Eh, I'll agree with those first two, but, I disagree with that last part." She raised her eyebrows at him, before continuing. "Somewhat stubborn? Uh, no. Sorry. Doesn't work that way. You, Landon Jacob Winchester, are completely and hopelessly stubborn. And you want to know how I know?" Audrey paused for effect, "I know because you're going to say that you are not completely and hopelessly stubborn. Which you are. Which proves my point. See? I win. You lose. Poor Landon. Yay Audrey." The blond shrugged slightly, as if this was to be expected.

If she hadn't been looking at Landon when he let out his laugh, she probably wouldn't have heard it. However, she'd seen it. And therefore, felt the need to give him a good punch in the shoulder, and stick out her tongue. "It's not funny! It's loud!" Audrey defended, pouting slightly as she settled back into her chair. After a few moments of hesitation, the blond laid her head on Landon's shoulder and made herself comfortable. "No, I'm fine here." She murmured. It was true. Another thing that was true was how amazingly... nice, and safe, it felt. He felt nice. And he smelled nice. Audrey wasn't sure what had possessed her to lay her head on Landon's shoulder. It was a definite no-no for friends that had once dated. Still, she'd done it anyway. Why? She didn't know. It just felt right.

Audrey nodded, smiling again. He was right. She was being silly. Even if they were never 'together-together' again, they'd keep in touch. And that was all that mattered. The school year was just beginning. They had a whole year left to spend together. Then, they'd face graduation together. After that, they just had to trust that they'd stay in touch, she supposed. Audrey nodded again at Landon's next words. "You've always been my best friend too." She told him quietly. It was true. Sure, Izzie was her best friend too, and she had loads of other close friends, but it had always really been Izzie and Landon as her best friends. Audrey liked it that way. Besides, after Landon and herself had broken up, she'd been able to spend time with Izzie. And whenever she and Izzie had had their little petty arguments, she'd been able to spend time with Landon. It all evened out in the end. "Promise?"

[landon jacob winchester]

Landon looked over at the blond haired girl, his own eyebrow raised in question. "You do, do you?" He waited for her to go on. "I am-" But he was cut off as she went on; saying exactly what he had been planning to say. Now that just wasn't fair. His bottom lip protruded slightly and he crossed his arms over his chest, full on pouting now. "You don't play fair Audrey Hazel Cooper." Landon muttered, nearly running the effect by grinning at the fact he had full named her. Oh, he was probably going to get it for that. But either way, it didn't matter. It was almost as if they were back to normal.

"Whatever you say." Landon said innocently as he looked around the nearly empty library. He watched her for the next few seconds, a grin spreading on his face. As he felt Audrey's head come to rest on his shoulder, he tensed. He wasn't used to this, and every instinct told him to run; it wasn't supposed to be this way. After a few seconds, he made himself relax and enjoy what would probably never happen again. "If you say so." He said softly as he hesistantly wrapped an arm around her waist. He took a second to remember this moment. He breathed in her scent, liking how she smelled just how he remembered; like spring, when everything was blooming and the world was at peace and beautiful. Everything about her scent screamed Audrey, and that was one thing he wanted to remember. He had just been about place a gently kiss to the top of her head, but stopped himself; remembering it wasn't his place anymore. That was someone elses job, not his. With a sad sort of look in his eyes, he looked out the window, watching the rain.

Landon smiled at that. Deep down he'd always known the two would remain best friends, but selfishly, that wasn't enough for Landon. But he would live with that, because as long as he was close to Audrey, then he could survive. After the two had broken up, Landon spent the majority of his time alone; doing homework, doing his prefect duties. When Audrey had come back, saying she wanted to be friends Landon had of course saying yes; he could never deny her anything. "I do." Landon promised. Sometimes promises could be broken, but Landon was going to do everything he could to make it all right for her; no matter what it took.

[audrey hazel cooper]

"Yep!" Audrey grinned up at Landon. Was she going to expand on that? Hell no. That wasn't her place anymore. She wasn't going to tell him she thought he was pretty. For one, he didn't need the ego boost. Two, they were broken up. And usually, in modern civilization, broken up people didn't go around telling each other how attractive they were, and feeding each other's egos. No. It didn't work that way, and it probably never would. Audrey laughed quietly to herself at Landon's pout. "Aw, come on, now." The blond reached up and ran her thumb over his pouty bottom lip, shaking her head the whole time. "You always knew I didn't play fair, Landon Jacob Winchester." She told him with a pout of her own to match. "And don't you full name me, mister. I know where you sleep."

"Shuddup." Audrey mumbled, giving him a small elbow to the side for good measure. He was tense. He hadn't been expecting that. Hell, she hadn't been expecting it either. She'd just done it. Damn her and her stupid whims. Damn her and her feelings. Just because it felt right? Seriously? Merlin. She was going to get herself into a lot of trouble one day. Honestly. Finally, Landon relaxed, and his arm worked it's way around her waist. It felt so right, so normal. Like that was the way it was supposed to be. Of course, they probably looked awkward, like teenagers on their first date. But that wasn't the way it felt. Well, not to Audrey, anyway. With the war raging around them, it was rare for anyone to feel as safe as the blond haired Ravenclaw felt at that moment. And if all it took was being close to Landon, she was sure she would be alright.

Okay. It was do or die time. Well, not really. Once she opened her big fat mouth it would be, though. Maybe she was pushing her luck. No, that was a lie. She was pushing her luck. She was already much closer to him than she should have been. But no. She had to push it. She was Audrey Hazel Cooper, after all. "Hey, Landon?" Here it goes. Do or die. "You think we'll ever be together again? Because I'm trying to be okay without you. I'm trying. But I'm not. I'm never okay unless you're right here. And even then I'm not okay, because I feel like I can't breathe. And you give me that look, Landon. And it just makes it worse. And I miss you. And I can't do this anymore. I can't be your friend. And I know I'm pushing it. I know. But I can't help it. You make me crazy. I'm going crazy over here. And I can't breathe anymore, Landon. I can't breathe." Finally, Audrey forced her mouth shut. She'd said enough. Ruined enough. She'd just ruined their relationship permanently, probably. Great. Standing up, the blond ran a hand through her hair. "So, I'm just gonna... go. Because I can't keep my mouth shut. So, yeah. I'm gonna go." Audrey told him, grabbing her bag off of the ground and her book off the table, keeping her eyes fixed on the table the entire time.

[landon jacob winchester]

Landon laughed at her certainty. She'd always been that way, and that was one of the many qualities Landon loved about her. The path Audrey's thumb made across his bottom lip tingled slightly, it was a familiar yet strange feeling. He remembered it feeling that way when they were together, together. "Point." Landon said softly as he smiled at her, quickly getting over his pouting phase. "Yeah, well I know where you sleep too. Not that I could actually get up there, but that doesn't matter. The point is, I still know where you sleep." And Landon used to be where Audrey slept. He rememebered the many mornings of waking up with her in his arms; Merlin, he missed that so much. He pushed the memories away and focused on the present.

"Geez. I'd nearly forgotten how abusive you were." Landon teased as he rubbed at his side. "Great, now I'm going to have a bruise. How am I going to explain that to the teachers? They'd never believe me if I told them a girl beat me up." Landon shook his head, acting as if he was seriously worried about what the teachers, what his friends would say. Nothing seemed to matter anymore as the pair rested comfortably, side by side. It was just Audrey and Landon, Landon and Audrey. There wasn't room for anyone or anything else, not right then anyway. If Landon closed his eyes, he could pretend like this was how it used to be, he could forget that they weren't together. But he knew once he opened his eyes, reality would set in and disappointment and hurt would overcome him once more. For now, he'd just enjoy this and deal with the painful reality later.

Landon looked down at Audrey, head tilted slightly. "Yeah?" He asked before closing his mouth once more. He waited for whatever she was going to say. And what she said hadn't been what he had expected. To be honest he never would have expected it. Holy crap. He had to be dreaming. She was rambling, and freaking out; two things Audrey should never do. Okay, so it took him a few minutes to realize what was happening. She was saying she missed him, she wanted him back. It was Landon's turn to panic, he had to be dreaming. That's right. He closed his eyes and opened them, realizing nothing had changed; not dreaming. Great. Then she was standing up, gathering her things. No, Landon didn't want that. Not right, not okay. He stood to, placing his hands on his shoulders, he turned her to face him. "Audrey. Breathe." He instructed, afraid she was going to pass out; and he didn't want that. With his thumb and index fingers, he lifted her chin; forcing her to look at him. Before he realized what was happening, his lips were on hers and everything about it screamed one thing, home.