`TANP, TTOOO

[audrey hazel cooper]

my guilty pleasure for you

[derek christopher parker]

Derek was sitting on a couch. It was a quite comfortable couch. Well, of course it was as the room was smart enough to know he expected a good couch in the room, not a shitty one. He had his legs propped up on the table in front of him as he waited for Audrey to show up. After all, it had been a week since they had made the bet. So now he just had to wait to see if she showed up. And if she did show up, see what she managed to figure out in the past week. Derek was actually looking forward to her getting there. Not just because he was almost positive that he had won...but because he was looking forward to seeing her again. Sure, during their last encounter she had seemed to get a little uptight but he sure as hell had fun. He had been thinking about her a lot over the past week. A lot more than he had thought he would after leaving the library that day. No matter how hard he tried to keep her out of his mind it was like his barrier had a damn crack in it and she just kept slipping through and invading his thoughts. Why? What was so special about her? Aside from her smile and that look she got in her eyes...No. He had to stop thinking about that. Audrey was a Ravenclaw, he was a Slytherin. They both had different things that they would be doing with their lives. Nope. No no no no. Derek couldn't let himself think anything else of her. But no matter how much he told himself that, he couldn't bring himself to actually do it.

Derek looked down at the spot next to him on the couch. Most Pontente Potions lay there and Derek couldn't help but grin slightly. He had neglected to return it to the restricted section just so he would be able to give it back to Audrey himself. Of course, she's have to say please as it was only polite. But she'd get it back. After what measures she had gone to get the book back, he was sure she'd still needed it. Audrey had kissed him. That ws certainly something he hadn't seem coming. No one would have. He and Cooper had never exactly gotten along well. Derek could remember shooting a fair share of comments her way through their years. So, why would she kiss him? The only explination was that she really really wanted the book back. But, even while Derek knew that must be the answer, he hoped it wasn't.

[audrey hazel cooper]

One week. On the first day, Audrey had decided to just get started right away after leaving the library, since she'd had nothing better to do with her time. Of course, if he'd just given her the damn book, she would have had something to do. But no, he'd had to be stubborn and keep it. Anyway, first on her list was a trip to the Staff Room to find Professor Flitwick, head of Ravenclaw. He knew a fair amount about his students, and even the students that weren't in his class, so when Audrey had assumed he would know Derek's middle name, she'd been right. Professor Flitwick had assured her that it was Christopher, and had even wrote a note, so that was her proof. So that took care of that.

Then, there was the home life. After asking around a bit, she'd concluded that there were no other students at Hogwarts by the last name Parker, so Derek obviously didn't have any siblings that were in school. Her brother's tutor Shelbee had an older brother in Slytherin that was in Audrey's year that didn't often feel the need to be a stupid jackass (unlike some people), so she'd been able to check with him to make sure that he didn't have any siblings at home. Gavin, Shelbee's brother, had also told her that Derek lived in London. So that was a plus. However, Audrey still felt she was missing something. There was something she'd read or heard or something. Something.

It wasn't until the seventh day while Audrey was in Muggle Studies that she realized that she had been wrong. There was someone else at Hogwarts with the last name Parker; her professor. Figuring it was worth a try, she'd doubled back after class had ended for a quick word with Professor Parker. He hadn't given her much, just looked a bit awkward when she'd asked if he was related in some way to Derek. Huh. Interesting.

Derek had been waiting in the Room of Requirement by the time Audrey had arrived. She swore under her breath as her blue eyes fell on him on the couch; well, that killed her plan now didn't it? She'd hoped the room would have been able to give her some sort of hint as to what she'd forgotten about him, but no. Derek just had to get there first and ruin her idea. Damn it all to hell. Without waiting for an invitation the blond plopped herself down on the couch, pulling the book into her lap afterwards. "I hope you know, you lost." Audrey told him with a small nod, her eyes on the book as she flipped through it's pages. Finally, her gaze raised to Derek, and she gave him a small smile in greeting. "Oh, and I still stand by what I said. You suck." She told him with a smirk.

[derek christopher parker]

Derek looked up when she entered the room and flashed her a grin in welcome. So what if she'd probably want to hit him again after it? He didn't give a shit. Not one bit. Derek almost said something in protest when she took the book right away but decided to let it go. She was supposed to say please first and then thank you after he had so kindly given it back to her. Oh well, he'd get over it. "Oh really? Care to enlighten me, oh great one?" Audrey couldn't have found out anything about him. Nothing of importance anyway. He didn't share anything with anyone in this school. Too many things got switched around and turned upside down and the next thing you knew you were born and raised in a professional circus with a clown for a mother and an elephant for a father.

"And I still stand by what I said, you're cute." Wait, he never said that. Oh well, he certainly thought it. Derek was glad he said it now, it was sure to keep her off guard for a while. He just really hoped she hadn't figured anything out or he'd owe her whatever it was her twisted mind could come up with. And, coming from Audrey, he knew it would be something good. Derek shook his head at his irrational thoughts. What was he thinking? There was no way she had any information. She was as good as done. "I've already got the favor I'm asking of you after I've proved that you have lost. So, come on, I want to get to the fun part of this little night."

[audrey hazel cooper]

"Oh great one will share her information in a moment." Audrey told Derek with a small nod as she shifted on the couch to make herself comfortable. Once she was leaning against the arm, she placed her feet in his lap, sending a grin his way that said that he could suck it up and deal. "Very nice hello, by the way. You're oh so very hospitable." She told him, letting out a sigh. Not that she'd given him a much better greeting. She'd just smiled. But no, he'd had to grin at her and make her stomach get that stupid feeling it had had in the library last week. That feeling needed to go away. It was going to be the death of her.

Raising her eyebrows at his words, Audrey watched Derek for a few moments. She didn't remember him saying that to her. "Are you hitting on me, Parker?" Audrey looked amused, and a small smirk played at her lips. Was he seriously hitting on her? For serious? Eh, he was probably just being a stupid Slytherin. It was like a sport for the Slytherin guys; getting the girls wrapped around their fingers and then leaving them in the dust as soon as they'd satisfied themselves and their stupid hormones. Probably. Though, Audrey found herself doubting herself slightly. Really? While Derek had never given her reason to believe otherwise, she got the feeling he wasn't completely doing that. But eh, that was probably just her own hormones talking.

"Oh, keep it in your pants." Audrey lifted herself off the couch slightly so she could get her hand down the front pocket of her jeans to retrieve her note from Professor Flitwick, before lowering herself back down and clearing her throat as she unfolded the parchment. "Your middle name is Christopher, according to Professor Flitwick," She began, handing him the note. "And you have no siblings, according to Gavin James of Slytherin. You were born in London, and that's where you live now."Audrey paused for a moment. She was forgetting something. Oh, right. "Professor Parker seemed a bit... uncomfortable when I asked him whether or not you two were related. Anyway, that's about it. Though I remember hearing something else. Can't put my finger on it."

[derek christopher parker]

Derek made a grab for her ankles after she placed her feet on his lap, intending to throw them off. But catching the look on her face he thought better of it and let it go. He was only being nice by letting her win this small thing. It was unimportant to him but would surely make her think she had some type of power here. Then, the next time, when she was being all cocky about something, he'd turn it back around and win....again. See? It was a good plan. Derek looked her in the eyes and immediatly regretted it. Now, that just wasn't fair. She hadn't even done anything and that damn feeling had come back. He hated it. No, he liked it but hated her for making him think he hated it when he really didn't which meant he had to hate her for making him admit to himself that he didn't hate it. Yup. That made sense. At least to him anyway.

"Nah. If the amazing Derek Parker was hitting on you, you wouldn't be questioning it, Cooper." Although, the amazing Derek Parker was wishing she'd wipe that smirk off her face. It was starting to get to him. And it wasn't in a good way. Except it was, which was why it was bad. Had he been hitting on her though? Probably. That was the only explination for it he supposed. However, he certainly wasn't going to let her know that. Not quite yet anyway. Maybe eventually. It all depended, really.

Derek raised an eyebrow at her, a smirk slowly taking place of his smile. "What are you talking about? It's still down there. Feel free to check." Part of him really wished she'd take him up on the offer. But that was just his hormones, he knew that. And he also knew she wouldn't check which kind of sucked. Derek let his smirk fade when she announced his middle name. He grabbed the note from her and wondered how Flitwick would know his middle name. Derek supposed he had it on a class list or something but how would he remeber it? Did he save all his class lists? It was possible. But he didn't know why he was worrying about it so much. It was just his middle name she figured out. Nothing of importance. ...Oh. Alright, so it wasn't just his middle name she knew. Derek made a mental note to kick Gavin's ass the next time he saw ihim for offering information to a random Ravenclaw that just happened to be asking for it. "Professor Parker?" Derek asked as he looked for a change to the conversation. If he could keep it going, maybe she'd forget that she'd won this little game. "Huh, fancy that. But as for what you forgot...that's deeply unfortunate isn't it? Too bad you didn't remember it."

[audrey hazel cooper]

"Amazing?" Audrey scoffed. "Someone's a bit full of themselves." Like this was news. Audrey knew fully well that Derek Parker had to have been one of the most arrogant, cocky, self assured people on the planet, Muggle world or Wizard. It was ridiculous, honestly. And what was even more ridiculous was the fact that a stupid, stubborn, sucky part of herself actually didn't mind it so much. There was something about that damn cocky grin that made her heart seem to skip a beat. It was awful. Awful, awful, awful. He was horrible to her, really. He needed to go away. Roll over and die or something. Anything that would keep him and his attractiveness away from her.

And there it was. That damn smirk. Audrey felt her eyes narrow, and grabbed a pillow off of the couch, before whacking him on the back of the head with it. He needed to stop looking at her like that. It wasn't doing either of them any good. Well, maybe it was doing him some good. She didn't know, and she didn't care. Well, at least she didn't think she cared. But what if she did care? Would that honestly be such a bad thing? Wait. Yes it would. What was she thinking? Was she high? For serious. It would be a very bad thing... Whatever it was she was thinking about. Audrey seemed to have forgotten while she'd been in the process of deliberating whether it'd be good or bad. Either way, she knew it'd be bad. Very bad.

Audrey felt her smirk return as Derek's faded. Haha! She had won. Right? Had she won? She didn't know. Maybe she had. She better have won. She'd slaved all over the castle finding out this information. Okay, maybe not. But if he asked she was sure going to say so. If he got to be dramatic, so did she. Those were the rules. That was the way it worked. The end. "Yes, Professor Parker." Audrey repeated with a small nod. She felt her eyebrows raise again as he began to attempt to divert her attention. Or at least that was what it seemed like he was doing. Now, that just would not do. Crossing her arms against her chest, the blond looked at him expectantly. "So? Did I win?"

[derek christopher parker]

"Yea? Well, I've earned it." It was true, sort of. He was born with natural good looks. It wasn't his fault. His parents were to blame. Derek was just here to reap the benefits of it. After all, that's the way that one saying went. When you have it, use it. Who was he to go against an ancient saying that had been passed along through many generations? Sure, he was Derek Parker and that was certainly something. He could go against it if he really wanted to. But why do it if the saying worked out in his favor? That just wouldn't make any sense. Then people like Audrey Cooper would win...even though they seemed to be winning anyway lately. No. Nope. That was a lie. He refused to believe it. She wasn't winning. Or at least, she wasn't winning in anything worth winning. He didn't think. Maybe? Perhaps? No. Why was he arguing with himself so much today? It had to be Audrey's fault. That was the only thing that made sense and he wasn't about to pass up the change to blame something on her.

Just when he was ending the arguement with himself inside his head, he was smacked with a pillow. "Hey..." Derek rubbed the back of his head and looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "...What the hell was that for?" Sure, in the library he had been a bit cocky with her and he had expected to get hit with a book. But why was he getting hit with a pillow now? He had barely said anything since she'd gotten here. Alright, if she had heard his thoughts, he'd understand why he got hit on the back of the head. She hadn't, though. So what was with the violence? A screw had to be loose in her head or something. That had to be it. Derek decided to say no more about his near death experience with the pillow. Revenge was sweet, he'd get her back before she left.

"Huh. You know, I haven't gone to one of his classes yet but I hear I haven't missed much." Derek shrugged and leaned back on the couch to make himself more comfortable. He considered her question for a moment as he rested his hands on the back of his neck and closed his eyes. He supposed she had technically answered everything he had told her she must in order to win. So, she technically won. Technically. Now, all he had to do was think of a way that prevented her from winning. After several minutes silence and no idea's popping into his head and setting off that little lightbulb that appeared in cartoons, Derek concluded that he had to admit it after all. "Alright. You've won. What do you want? Lay it on me." He didn't bother to move as he spoke. It's not like the deal said he had to jump to his feet and obey her command as soon as it was given. Nah, Derek was quite confortable here on the couch and intended to take his time getting around to whatever ridiculous stunt she was going to have him pull.

[audrey hazel cooper]

Again, Audrey scoffed. Right. Sure he had. He'd completely earned the right to be full of himself? Uh, no. She highly doubted that. He probably hadn't earned anything in his entire life. He seemed the type to have had everything handed to him. He probably hadn't seen any hardships at all. Reminding herself to play nice, Audrey let out a small sigh. She shouldn't judge a book by it's cover, that's what her mother had always told her. For someone that hated judgments or labels, Audrey figured she had to have been one of the most judgmental people in the school. Well, maybe not the whole school. But that wasn't the point.

"Stop looking at me like that." Audrey ordered stubbornly. Of course, now that she'd told him to stop looking at her like that, he'd probably start doing it more than he had been before. Great. She should have kept her mouth shut. She really needed to learn how to just keep it zipped instead of sharing every little thought that came to mind. She was just empowering him and his stupid, arrogant, egotistical charm. ... Charm? Charm. No. No charm. He had no charm. No power over her whatsoever. Period. No charm. No control. No power. Nothing. He had nothing. Despite the fact she knew it was a losing battle, Audrey stubbornly repeated those words in her head as she watched him, glaring.

"From who? One of your little girlfriends?" ... Damnit. Why did that thought irritate her more than it should? Audrey hated that. She hated her stupid brain, she hated her stupid hormones, but most of all, she hated him. Jackass. As Derek informed her of his defeat, the blond felt herself smile. Ha. She had won. That's right. That was how she did it. Ravenclaws kicked some serious ass, contrary to popular belief. Oh, her brother would be hearing about this one. Too bad you didn't get house points for winning against the Slytherins. That'd be pretty kick ass. Considering his words for a moment, Audrey finally shrugged. "The satisfaction of knowing I won is good enough for me. However, I wanna know what you would have made me do if you had won."

[derek christopher parker]

Derek had to admit that most of his life had been pretty damn easy. So, there were a few small bumps along the way and a few bigs ones as well. But that happened to everyone. Shit happened and people got over it. That was just the way life worked. But he still stood by the fact that he had earned the right to be cocky just because he said so. He was an only child with...well...weird parents. Or parent. It all depended on if he was going to get technical about it. He had girls whenever he wanted them for years and people rarely told him no. When they did, he didn't listen anyway. So, he didn't exactly have many obstacles standing in his way from being cocky. Therefore, he earned it. How that made sense, he didn't know. It just did. And so long as he didn't have to attempt to explain it to anyone else it would continue to make perfect sense.

"Why?" Derek asked, smirking at her again. "Does it bother you?" He kept the look on his face as he grabbed all the pillows and threw them away from the couch so she couldn't attempt to cut his head off with one again. So long as she had no weapons near her, he could continue to make the face in safety with the guarantee that he was getting to her. "Aw...come on. Don't look at me like that. Here, I know something that will make you smile." Derek leaned toward her, making sure to keep his face impassive. Once he was leaning forward as far as he could with her legs still on his lap, he put a smirk on his face. He knew he'd probably end up getting slapped or something. But it was a small price to pay for getting to her.

"Nah, just the word on the street. I don't have a girlfriend." Why he felt the need to make that known, he didn't know. Only he did. He was just going to pretend he didn't. It made it easier on him. Derek raised an eyebrow at her when she stated that she didn't want anything. He was surprised but he certainly wasn't going to argue with it. It was a one time offer and if she wanted to pass it up that was just fine with him. Derek leaned back on the couch again and resumed the position he had taken before he had decided to smirk at her again in a closer vicinity. His eyes closed once again, Derek cupped his neck in his hands without taking the grin off his face. "Don't worry about it." Whether he was keeping it from her because he just didn't think she should know right yet or because he knew it would piss her off more than if he told her, Derek didn't know. It was probably a little of both. Yup, he was positive it was.

[audrey hazel cooper]

Audrey glared. "Yes, it does bother me." She replied simply, pursing her lips at Derek as he began to smirk again. Damn him. Damn him and his smirk. He needed to go away. She should leave. Yup, she should just leave. He was being mean, and looking at her like that, and it wasn't nice. Besides, she'd won, and she'd gotten her book back. Well, technically she wasn't getting it back since she'd never really had it for more than a few seconds, but that was an insignificant detail in the grand scheme of things, she supposed. Yup. She'd reached a decision. It was about as unimportant as the breakfast she'd had that morning. Which really hadn't been too great. Or maybe it had. She hadn't really been paying attention. She'd been too busy daydreaming as people rambled at her about stuff she really didn't even remotely give a damn about.

"If you can look at me like that, I should be allowed to look at you however the bloody hell I want to." Audrey muttered bitterly. Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no. What was he doing? She fought the urge to tell him to go away as he leaned towards her. What was he doing? He needed to sit back up and leave her alone. Not to mention the fact he needed to stop looking at her like that. Yup. That sounded about right. Sit up, leave her alone, stop making that face. If he did all that, she'd be happy. Pursing her lips as to avoid a smile spreading, Audrey's eyes narrowed. "Stop it." She ordered, her hand colliding with his cheek. That would wipe that look off his face pretty damn fast, she was sure. Hell, when she left, she sure intended to slap herself for even coming remotely close to letting him know she didn't mind that damn smirk so much.

The blond looked surprised, to say the very least. Ah, well, she shouldn't have been. "Flings more your type of thing, I suppose." Why that thought bothered her more than it should have, Audrey didn't feel like figuring out. Or admitting to herself. One of those two. Okay, okay. The latter. But what did that matter? Again, the insignificant detail thing came into play. "I want to know. So tell me. You said you would do whatever I said if I won, and that's what I want you to do. I want you to tell me. So do it." She paused for a moment. "I'm gonna hit you again if you don't." Okay, maybe not. And he probably wouldn't care anyway. But whatever. Useless information.