Hurt, AW

[Shadowcat9279]

I hurt myself today,
To see if I still feel,
I focus on the pain,
The only thing that's real,

The needle tears a hole,
The old familiar sting,
Try to kill it all away,
But I remember everything,


Discord landed between the Predacon camp and the Maximal colony and transformed from his large bird form to his larger root mode. He looked from one place to the other with a sadness welling in his spark. He silently watched with a sigh. The Predacons.....his... replacements.... the old flyer was really feeling his age as he watched these youngsters go about their day. Yes they were all adults but... not one of them realized their ancestors codeing with in them. It was a line... that was destined to disappear with him when he finally rusted away.

With that thought he moved away to look over at the Maximal's. They knew their codeing and understood their ancestors... and yet.... The only Autobot among them was Sludge. Possibly the youngest Autobot still alive. He shook his head at that sad thought. No one deserved his fate so when he realised that Sludge had upgraded he smiled. Discord noticed Lightfang then and smiled gently. She had been able to adapt, she had a family and was now passing on knowledge to Pancore, Maydae and all the others among the Zeta Colony ... while he.... well...he was the same.

What have I become,
My sweetest friend,
Everyone I know,
Goes away in the end,

And you could have it all,
My empire of dirt,
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt,

Discord backed up and found his place right between the two bases and sat on a fallen tree to put his head in his hands. He was all alone. Never had he felt so alone as he had right then. He had tried so hard... so many times to take a shot and just fade away. He missed his Freefall now more then ever and it was tearing his spark apart. His beautiful bondmate who was taken from him so long ago. He loved her so much...


I wear this crown of thorns,
Upon my liars chair,
Full of broken thoughts,
I cannot repair,

Beneath the stains of time,
The feelings disappear,
You are someone else,
I am still right here,

Would she still be waiting for him after all this time?

What have I become,
My sweetest friend,
Everyone I know,
Goes away in the end,

And you could have it all,
My empire of dirt,
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt,

Would she even still want him after all he had done?

Discord never wished for anything before.... but now he did. He wished he had a chance.... just one .... to do it all again...

Discord could not stop the fluids that spilled from his optics

If I could start again,
A million miles away,
I will keep myself,
I would find a way



---------
Song by NiN ('93) and Johnny Cash (2002)

[Mayhem]

Maydae was sneaking back to the camp as much as a giant white bear could go by unnoticed. Her main trick was to not hurry. Moving swiftly always caught other’s attention. On the other cervo, most bots paid no attention to anyone wandering or meandering about. It was no secret that she had been spending time at the Maximal med bay. However, it wasn’t something she nessisarily wanted to draw more attention too.

On the way back, she continued her casualness by adding in a swim in the small pond she had seen a werewolf cub fishing in. It was within Maximal territory but it was also water. She had missed swimming. After cooling off in the pond and stealing one of the fish, she sauntered back towards the camp. That was when she detected a signal that put an actual smile on her normally grumpy face. Maydae had to concentrate on not rushing but she still headed straight for him.

The damp bear lumbered around the tree and still held her acquired fish in her mouth. When she caught his expression though, her smile vanished. Fear and confusion replaced the smile and she nosed his jaw joint softly. After a moment of trying to think of what to do, she softly place the dead fish on his lap then looked back at him with a tentative smile.

[Lilblacknwhitebot]

Blackout had been searching since the 'quake, searching for a hint that he'd made it out. Him of all mechs. The strange, dark seeker she knew from somewhere else.

He'd given her another name at their first encounter by the damaged antennae and for some reason it resonated with her. Hyperdrive was what he'd called her... Hyperdrive. Their time together had been fleeting, he'd basically rescued her after a bad landing, patched her up and brought her back to base, leaving her with Lightfang with a few words she hadn't picked up.

Since then she hadn't heard a word. Oh, he'd been around, that was for certain. The femme never once forgot a comm. signal. He'd been listening in, no doubt looking for tidbits of information that could have been of use to him but as far as she knew he hadn't done any harm by the information he'd picked up.

And now?

Well, now she'd finally spotted him...

It was a curious reaction though, a mixture of concern for him and the merest hint of jealousy toward other femme. The white bear who'd given him a fish.

The bat-femme circled above, watching their exchange with suspicion, waiting on the outcome.

(OOC: Teeheehee.... )

[Shadowcat9279]

It took a moment for Maydae's movements and nuzzles to even sink in with him in this state. Slowly he actually came too and looked at the dead fish on his lap with a half smile. He caught her meaning easily. She wanted him to cheer up and how could he not at least smile to the young femme at the gesture.

"Thanks Maydae. I appreciate it." He picked it up and handed it back to her. "But fis makes me gassy. And nothing is worse then a stinky old bird leaking stinky gasses."

[Mayhem]

“You’re the bot who taught me to enjoy organic food,” she objected but picked the fish back up anyways.

Maydae pressed her massive head against his cheek and rubbed it like a cat seeking attention. Then she settled down on the ground so that she was pressed up against him while she started fripping the fish apart.

“I could always just turn off my olfaction processors.”

Normally she would have eaten the fish in a gulp or two but she deliberately ate slower in case he decided to join her.

“Domina made me head of Engineering,” she offered the good bit of news because it was over due and she didn’t know if she should dive right away into drilling him with questions about why he was sad.

“And Lightfang’s going to teach me how to boss around guards.”

[Shadowcat9279]

Discord welcomed the distraction that his dark thoughts were bringing him. He chuckled at the rub to his cheek and rubbed her ears in return knowing that they could be a hard to reach place for her to scratch at times.

"Your a sweet young lady Maydae, to cheer this old bird up." He smiled as he watched her eat. At her news though his face lit up. "Excellent news! And Im glad your not mad at me for taking you to a Maximal for care after your injuries. Its just.... I knew I could trust her and that you would be in good hands."

Disord pulled a dead feather from his arm and let the wind take it away. "Old Fang and I go back aways. She is good at mending everything from broken bones to a broken spirit. Its no wonder so many call her grandmother. " He looked back at Maydae with gentleness and some pride in his friend. "She speaks very highly of you."

[Mayhem]

There was only one bot in the world that could have touched her like that. True, she did trust Lightfang but Maydae was still tense while onboard the Maximal ship. It was hard to rewrite her programming that told that Maximals would kill her if she let her guard down. She trusted Lightfang but she did not trust the others. Either way, Discord and Lightfang were the only ones who could touch her without risk of being bitten or mauled and so far Discord remained the only one to touch her without her tensing up.

“I’m not sweet,” she grumbled but the tug of a smile at the corners of her mouth gave away her pleasure at his statement. She finished the fish and rested her head on his lap so to enjoy the scratch behind the ears. It wasn’t like she could rub them herself without risk of tearing them with her claws. Plus it felt darn good. Her eyes closed as she listened to him.

Before she could stop it, a shutter gripped her. Her eyes opened to try and ward off the resurfacing images. Even without the visual recall aids she could clearly remember the terror of being brought onto the Maxie’s ship.

“I was never mad. Scared and confused why you would bring me there but not mad. I understand now why you did,” she passed before finishing the thought, “I saw the repair charts. I would be offline if not for you and her.”

Maydae quietly placed a paw on his leg beside her jaw joint.

“She does?” Maydae lifted her head but dipped it again in embarrassment at the excited squeak her audio processor made.

“She’s a better medic than me,” Maydae said. It was not said to bash her own skills but to give one of the highest praises she could.

“She speaks well of you too.”

[Lilblacknwhitebot]

Above, the batfemme held her position, finely tuned audios honing in on the conversation with ease. Listening for a while, Blackout finally made sense of the arrangement between Bear and Bearded Vulture; Discord was playing chaperone to the younger femme as he had once to her, she felt.

Listing slightly, she caught a thermal and climbed a little way up only to coast down closer to the conversation. If she timed it right, she'd make the overhanging branch behind them, if not... well, she'd be back in with Lightfang again for repairs and a burned audio for eavesdropping. With a mental shrug and a quiet click, she slipped downward and banked hopefully out of sight, aiming for the aforementioned tree.

Flaring wings backward and out at the last possible moment to break, she latched onto the branch and deftly swung up into the canopy. The switch between modes took a few seconds to complete with any sense of stealth and slightly longer for her. Finally, the small, dark femme edged back along the limb to rest against the trunk of the tree. Cocooned in her wings against prying optics and radiation, she sat and watched the exchange.

[Shadowcat9279]

Discord smiled as he rubbed Maydae's ears. "As I said... we are old friends, though I dont know why she talks highly of me. Im just a tough old turkey." He chuckled.

"I just knew I could trust Lightfang to take care of you. I .... I was truly very afraid to lose you Maydae." He smiled at her. "Ive come to see you as a younger sister. I hope you dont mind that." In truth he was desperate for family. The old mech had not had any contact in so long.

[Mayhem]

Maydae huffed her content and was relaxing more and more by the second. Her head not rested headily upon him and her optical receptors were full closed. She would have never guessed that an ear rub could feel so good.

“In some human cultures, turkey was a delicacy,” she said sleepily. Odd a thing as it was to say, it was her awkward way of trying to give a compliment. Her social skills were still rusty but, thanks to Discord and Lightfang, she was using them more.

Maydae felt a chill that had nothing to do with her internal coolants trying to keep her core temperature down – polar bears had a tendency of overheating in the sun. The reminder of her accident and the fear she had felt chilled her. However, the chill was melted away by his revelation. Thankfully Maydae had no idea they were being watched and was free to be completely open.

“Guess that’s alright,” she said while rolling onto her side. Having the long neck of a polar bear, she was able to comfortably keep her head in place for the ear rub.

“But you’re much more than a big brother,” she confessed and tensed as she admitted it. Maydae had never truly had a family yet he was she pictured a father or guardian should be. When terrified and at her most vulnerable, he was the one she turned to without hesitation. Whenever she had a problem, she always thought of him and wanted his advice. He was more than a sibling to her.