Welcome to Divine Guidance. In order to fully enjoy your time here, I must ask you to follow a few simple rules. Fail to do so, and I will not fail to go Medieval on your monkey ass.

Rule #1: I don't give a flying fuck if your character speaks like a rude sonuvabitch or if they talk like the prim and proper Queen of fucking England. If, by some chance, you do offend someone, apologize and move on. It's common fucking courtesy. If you cannot manage to do that, then you will get a warning. If you fail to listen multiple times, you'll get banned. If, in fact, you use another account to try and piss me off, I'll stuff a brick up your rectum. Sideways.

Rule #2: We here at DG are some mean muthafuckas, but when it comes to the lovin, we know to take it off the main page. So, please don't put your pitiful attempts at sex on the main page where everyone can see them. Unless you're like me, and are only doing so to embarrass them. Just like common courtesy above, if you fail to follow, expect some good bricky-loving.

Rule #3: Any attempts to complain about someone who has done nothing fucking wrong, or an attempt to complain without proof, will go down as a minor warning. Seriously, it's just like any office. Claim the guy down the row stole the staples, unless you have him stapled to the fucking wall, it's not going to be given notice by the bosses. Like any real boss, I'll say this: If it's just an argument, handle it yourself.

Rule #4: We aren't entirely cold-hearted here. If you have questions, or need some advice, do not hesitate to ask. We of the top tier have actually been through some major shit. Unfortunately, it hasn't helped us, but it can help you.

If you have any complaints or accusations, such as that we stole your ideas or stole your story, feel free to consult our Legal Department at: (601) 480-4662. Daniel Sollie will be glad to resolve whatever issues you may have with our service.