Let's Hit The Open Road, Alana

[Matt Roberts]

Matt sat at the empty stands in the Quidditch pitch. He was trying to focus on anything other than the crumpled bit of parchment that was in his clenched fist. Patience was not one of the virtues that the seventh year possessed. His father's response, which had been long awaited, held none of the comfort that he had been depending on, not in the least. A simple two-sentenced response, "I'm trying to figure out the best response. Be patient." It never helped when anyone told him to be patient either. He let out a loud groan of frustration and focused on one of the set of hoops at the farther end of the pitch.

He began to let his mind wander to the legendary wizard sport. He had never played on a team himself but it wasn't because he didn't think he was decent at it. It was more for a reason to keep his pride about him. Mallory, his younger sister by two years, was ten times the player that he would ever be. He wasn't about to be shown up by his little sister. He half wished that he hadn't have let that stop him, playing a sport would probably be a nice way to get all of the aggression out of his system. He normally wasn't an angry person but he wasn't the type of person who could handle stress and frustration. It would have been nice to have a more physical outlet than simply writing. Maybe that's how Mallory was such a tough person.

Alright, Quidditch wasn't going to keep his mind off of how he felt for much longer. He had sent an owl to Alana earlier in the day to meet him here at this time, well kind of this time. He was twenty minutes early as it was, he had gotten to the pitch about ten minutes ago too. He tapped his foot and clenched his fist even tighter, what could he do? His father was trying but he wasn't being fast enough. He didn't know how much longer he could wait till he went and fought her father.

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana practically ran out to the Quidditch pitch. She was anxious and nervous. Her stomach was twisting in knots, not that that was any different from how it had been the past few days anyway. She had gotten Matt's owl earlier asking her to meet him at the Quidditch pitch. She really hoped he wanted to meet because he had gotten a response from his father about their situation. Her patience was starting to wear thin. A small part of her hoped that it didn't have anything to do with her father or his father, and that it was just that he wanted to meet with her. They had recently become a couple and, though they usually spent most of their time together, they didn't always get to spend that time together without having to focus on studying for NEWTS or working on a potions project.

She pushed her hair out of her face as she got closer to the pitch. She never noticed before how far away it was from the rest of the school- it usually didn't seem so far when she was going to a game. Odd. Finally, she made her way up to the Ravenclaw stands. She spotted Matt and went over to sit down next to him. Alana gave him a quick smile and then frowned. He didn't look happy at all. Her gaze picked up on the crumpled paper in his hand and she knew that he had heard from his father and that it hadn't been good news at all. She put her hand on his shoulder gently, "Hey. You wanted to meet? Is everything alright?" she figured she knew the answer to that question already, but she would let him tell her.

[Matt Roberts]

Matt sat as still as a statue while he waited for Alana. He couldn't release the tight grip that he had on the bit of parchment that had completely destroyed any of the small bit of hope he had felt in the last few days while waiting for his father's answer. How could he have been so dependent? While his father did normally come up with an answer he did it in such a timely, logical way that it always seemed like decades until the solution was solved. Then again, this was only the opinion of one very impatient individual. The scowl hadn't left his face when he heard the footsteps approaching. He didn't even turn towards her as she sat down beside him. He felt like too much of a failure - like he was letting her down and that was an insufferable pain for Matt.

He looked at her for a moment, sighing and un-clenching his fist for the first time in what felt like a few hours. His fingers were hardly mobile. He read the letter aloud to her, the disappointment evident in his voice. He looked at her before crumbling the letter back up once again, "I'm sorry. I really thought he would have an answer a lot sooner. I mean its not too late to do things ourselves but I've realized that all of this is completely up to you. So whatever your wish is, its my command." He said this with a bitter tone and it was because he was bitter that if she told him he couldn't go after her uncle, he would inevitably have to obey.

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana just stared out at the field, unblinking, as Matt read her his father's owl. He didn't know what to do? How could he not know what to do? He was supposed to guide them and give them the answer so they could get this whole situation behind them. And be patient? What did he think they had been doing? Ok, so maybe they weren't being as patient as they could be- hadn't she just been telling Matt that they needed to be patient? But, that was back when she thought his father would have an actual solution.

Alana grabbed Matt's hand and held it in her own. She needed the comfort and figured he did too. It seemed like fate, or whatever was responsible for this whole ridiculous situation, was laughing at her. Again. She didn't want her and Matt to go off and have to fight her father- that as supposed to be the last option, a fail-safe of sorts. She never expected it might actually come to that. She looked up at him, squeezing his hand in reassurance, "Don't be sorry. You've done nothing to be sorry for. It's not your fault your father needs some more time." she tried to sound comforting, but her voice was laced with a sad undertone. What did she ant to do about this? Should they wait some more, drive themselves crazier, only to receive another owl saying he still didn't know hat to do? Or should they try and fight? Alana worried her bottom lip between her teeth. "I don't know. I'm tired of waiting, but at the same time, I'm scared to fight him on our own." she sighed and pulled her robes tighter around her.

[Matt Roberts]

He could feel that Alana was disappointed, which was saying something since Matt hardly understood any kinds of emotions unless they were simple emotions...and his own. But she had every right to feel disappointed, their one safety net had a huge, gaping hole in it. And that safety net was being held over fire, one that was slowly burning the threads of the net, until it eventually collapsed. This wasn't a situation that they could take their time to solve. If something wasn't done about it soon, something else horrific could happen. What would her father do to her next? Matt shuddered at the question, imagining ghastly, descriptive answers in his head. No, they couldn't wait much longer before some course of action was necessary.

Matt gripped onto Alana's hand tightly, needing the comfort from the touch of her hand. It was foolish how it made him feel more at ease, it was illogical. How could something like that have such an effect? As frustrated as he was for not knowing the answer, he let himself calm down a little bit, the anger and pain slowly trying to ebb away. He groaned, "But it is my fault for solely depending on him. I should have been trying to think of suggestions, other options, just in case this sort of thing happened. Its a pretty time-sensitive subject, wouldn't you say?" The question was meant to be rhetorical but he couldn't help but wonder if she did agree, just to make sure. He nodded his head solemnly, "It sounds like it would be a battle. Would your uncle fight with us?" He hated to ask that question, though her uncle was someone whom she respected and normally didn't wish to talk about, they needed any outside help that they could get.

[Alana Starbeck]

Now what were they supposed to do? Their one avenue of hope had a huge road block in it, and no way to really go around it. She supposed they could fight her father, but she didn't know if she wanted to take that chance. Now that she and Matt were more than friends, she definitely didn't want to lose him. He was the one good thing in her wretched, wretched life. Alana also supposed they could wait longer and see if his father came up with an answer for them. But how long would that take? In the meantime, she and Matt would probably be moping around like they had been before, and that hadn't gotten them anywhere really. Well, except it brought them together as a couple. But the tension from waiting for so long might affect that as well. she continued to nibble on her lip, wishing she had some grass to play with. Her hands were getting fidgety, a sure sign she was nervous.

Alana gave Matt a weak smile as he gripped her hand. She knew he wanted to fight, and she was thankful to have him by her side for support. But could they actually do this? could they take on her father? And win? She didn't know, but it seemed like the only thing to do. Alana shook her head at his words, "No. It's not your fault. You wanted to fight in the first place, I'm the one who persuaded you to talk to your father." she sighed. "It is rather time sensitive. I don't know what else he has up his sleeve in regards to me. I know my mother mentioned something about marriage, but I don't know much about it. He's tried to arrange a marriage for me before, but thankfully he seems to have given up on that as there were no 'acceptable' suitors." Alana rolled her eyes at this statement. Her father and his ridiculous, out-dated notions. She thought about Matt's question. Would her Uncle fight with them. She didn't know. "He might. Simply because it's for me. But, once he figures out who's son you are, he might not. I don't think he would risk Azkaban for this- even as much as he cares for me." the sadness in her voice was unmistakable. She didn't doubt her Uncle Bastian would help her, if it were only her he had to deal with. Involving anyone else might make him leery. Stupid pansy Death Eater.

[Matt Roberts]

Matt's face immediately darkened when Alana brought up the topic of an arranged marriage. That, now more than ever, was not something that Matt was going to let happen. Alana was his now and he'd be damned if her poor excuse of a father tried to take her away from him. He spoke through clenched teeth, "Well, I for one am certainly not going to risk your father taking you away and making you marry some git. Or well, making you marry anyone but especially some stupid, foul, loathsome little git. My dad can sit and try to work things out his way but I'm going to go ahead and start studying some more advanced magic. I can talk to Professor Finnigan, I'm sure he'd be more than willing to teach me everything he knows or as much as he can teach me," and he nodded his head once, as though affirming everything he had just said. Jason would help him, he had to. They had been as close as student and teacher could be and he always made top marks in the class. He knew Matt wanted to become an Auror, he knew there was a huge war coming up, so he would more than likely not be asking any questions about the urgency of learning all of it.

Matt nodded his head, he understood what Alana was saying but not entirely. "While I realize he and my father probably greatly dislike each other. This is a fight for you and my father knows how important you are to me. You're also important to him. He wouldn't go after your uncle if he was to help us in this. Though I could understand why your uncle may not want to fight side-by-side one of his enemies children. That I can understand. It would just be someone who would be able to use Dark Magic if it was necessary, since thats what your father will be using. I refuse to ever perform spells like that, even if they would help, we need someone who will." And he didn't want that person to be Alana either. He was sure that she was capable but he couldn't help that he didn't want her involved in the Dark Arts either.

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana cringed slightly at Matt's tone. She had forgotten what a sensitive subject arranged marriage was for him- well, for them. She wasn't all too keen on an arranged marriage and she thought she had permanently talked her way out of that situation. Her mother had assured her that her father had stopped looking because he was "never going to find a suitable husband for his useless freak of a daughter". She hadn't minded him calling her those things if it meant she got to choose whom she married. "Well, I'm just as unhappy about it as you are. I would like to actually choose who I am going to marry. Now that I'm in lo.... a relationship, I can choose when and if I want to get married." Alana had almost let the wrong words come out of her mouth and she hoped Matt wouldn't notice. It was a bit early in their relationship to be spouting words of love. Though, she did love him, she always had, just now her feelings were a bit more muddled because she used to love him as a friend, now there was more to it. She decided to drop the subject, "If you get Professor Finnigan to agree, let me know. I can use some extra help as well. I know a lot of spells, but the more the better."

Alana thought about what Matt said, maybe if she talked to her uncle and explained it all to him he would agree? She would have to owl him. " Your dad would do that for me? That's.... I'm beyond grateful." Alana really and truly didn't have the words to express her gratitude, so instead, she leaned in and kissed Matt on the cheek. "I will owl him about it and see if he is willing to help. I know how angry he was when my father used to hurt me, he tried to protect me and he was even angrier when he couldn't. He told me once that he felt he had let me down because he hadn't been able to stop my father. I think that's why he became so drawn to You Know Who, because he was offering him power and prestige and a reputation of darkness. Maybe he will see this as a way to 'redeem' himself." She smiled sadly to herself. She loved her Uncle so much, he was the father she never had. But her Uncle had lost favor with her when she found out he was a Death Eater. Alana had heard all of the pureblood propaganda and thought people were being obscenely obtuse. She shook her head internally, clearing her thoughts and bringing her back to the present. How had she been so lucky to find someone like Matt? He was wonderful. "Thank you." she whispered. "I know you would be by my side through thick and thin, but I wanted to say thank you. For being here for me, for understanding, for helping, for... everything."

[Matt Roberts]

Matt felt disgusted with himself once again. He had made the situation somehow involve himself when in essence it did...it really didn't compare to what it did for Alana. He was going to have to man up and stop being such a baby about it all, he was being selfish and he had always thought that he was one of the more selfless people out there. Apparently he had been lying to himself all along. He noticed her stutter over her words but he was too caught up in his little epiphany to really notice what it was that she was stumbling over. He sighed and squeezed her hand, "I'm sorry Alana, I know that it sucks even worse for you. There I went again, acting like it revolved around me when this is about you. Anytime that I do that I want you to throw a hex at me or something. Knock some sense into me," he told her this with a smile on his face but his tone was serious. He really did want her to do that. Matt nodded his head, "I'll let you know if he does. I don't see why he wouldn't agree to help, he'll just think I'm trying to get some extra Auror training in or something." Matt felt quite positive that Finnigan would help, why wouldn't he?

Matt smiled as she kissed him on the cheek but he looked at her rather sternly afterwards, "Of course my father would do that for you. We've been friends for how long now? You're practically family anyways, now more than ever. Plus, I'm his son, so he kind of doesn't want me to get hurt by doing something foolsih either," he grinned at that. If his father didn't step in he would indeed do something foolish, like go duel a very powerful Dark twisted wizard. His father wouldn't want that for his son or for Alana. Matt wasn't sure how to respond to the bit about her uncle so he merely nodded, "We could use all the help we could get. I'm not going to pretend that it doesn't make me a little nervous that he couldn't take on your father. But, as usual, I have a lot of faith in myself," he told her, though he had his usual smug look on he couldn't help but wonder in this instance, if it was a bad thing to have so much faith in himself. Mallory had always told him that his pride was inevitably going to be his downfall. He wished that he could talk to her about everything that was going on but he had promised her to not tell anyone, well, besides his father. He wasn't used to keeping secrets from his little sister but he'd do it for Alana. Besides, if Mallory knew about it she would want to throw herself into battle as well, and as passionate and courageous as she may be, that was not going to happen while Matt was still alive and kicking. Matt leaned in and kissed her on the forehead, "Don't thank me. Its what I want to do. I want to be here for you, to understand you, to help you, to protect you. There's nothing else I'd rather do." And he meant every word.

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana chuckled softly at Matt. He did sometimes have a habit of making things about him, but this situation really did involve him now. If they were together, then it was their problem if her father tried to marry her off. Just like with their problem before, with her father and his abuse, they needed to face this together. She nudged him with her elbow, "Well, it's about both of us. If my father tried to marry me off, that involves both of us, because we are together, so it is a little bit about you." her voice was teasing, but serious. She didn't want to be married off, she wanted to choose for herself. Alana could only hope her father wasn't trying to rekindle such a barbarous tradition again. She really had thought she'd put a stop to it all. "But, if you're going to allow me to hex you or do you some form of bodily harm every time you become self-absorbed, well, I won't pass up the opportunity." she gave him a playful smirk. Alana just nodded her head in reply to his response. Professor Finnigan would know why they were going to want more practice. Well, he would probably have an inkling of an idea, but no real proof. She had already spilled some of her story to him anyway.

She smiled at him. "True. But, it's still always a surprise to me how self-less your family is towards me. I know it shouldn't be but I am. After so many years of having to fend for myself, it's nice to have people to rely on." Alana flashed him another smile and squeezed his hand. "Well, I don't want you doing something foolish either, but it looks like we may not have much of a choice." her smile dropped from her face to be replaced by a frown. She really didn't want them to have to go duel her father, but no other options seemed to be forthcoming. Alana sighed heavily. She hoped her Uncle Bastian would help, but she wasn't going to hold her breath. "We will see about him. I'm not going to put all my faith on it though. Not that I don't think that he wouldn't want to help, I just don't know if he will. He's such a coward." she muttered angrily. She moved closer to Matt and put her head on his shoulder. He was too sweet, too self-less, too kind and noble. How had she ended up being so lucky enough to get him as boyfriend, much less as a friend? She didn't really know, nor did she really want to ponder it. She had him and that was all that mattered right now. She smiled to herself. "I wouldn't trade this for anything." she replied.

[Matt Roberts]

Matt didn't know how to feel about her chuckling at him. It wasn't rude or mean or condescending or anything negative but he didn't want her laughing about it either. He was being completely serious and he wanted to make sure that she took it as such. He knew that it did involve him to an extent, he was her significant other at the point. But even though Matt would be crushed beyond belief if somehow she did have to go through with it and he couldn't save her from it, she would also be without him and married off to someone she would more than likely loathe. The situation was obviously far worse for her. Matt nodded his head seriously, "Yes, it does involve me but only to an extent. Obviously you would get the worse end of the deal." He was unable to keep the bitterness out of his tone. He couldn't even begin to imagine how much pain he would endure if Alana was taken from him now. He already knew that he was in love with her, he had been all along he had simply been blinded. But now he had everything he never knew he always wanted and he wasn't about to give it up for anything. He wouldn't give her up without a fight and that was for damn sure. He glared at her playfully, though it wasn't as full-hearted as it normally was, "Well, now I didn't say when I was being self-centered ever. I just meant about this situation. Now say it was about anything else, you don't have the right to hex me. We both know that its incredibly hard for me to never be self-centered." It was true. It was just another one of his flaws. Oh well, most people had them. Matt went over his game plan for what he would say to Jason and he was more than positive he could get away with it easily. Jason was always willing to help Matt out, just as much as Slughorn would be willing to help Alana if she was in need. There was an unbreakable bond between himself and Jason, of that he was sure. The only reason he wouldn't tell him Alana's secret was because it wasn't his secret to tell. If it had been anyone else, well besides Mallory, he probably would tell him.

Matt gave her a warm smile but couldn't help but feel sorry for her. He knew that his family was selfless, he was probably the least selfless, but they were always there for anyone who needed them. They were all Gryffindor like in that sense he reckoned, they were always willing to be the martyr if it came down to a friend or loved one. Always. He draped his arm around her shoulder, "Well you're practically part of our selfless family. You can always rely on us. We don't really give up ever either. So we're here till the end and that is something that I know I can promise you." He was glad that he could offer something to Alana that he felt no one else could offer her. He nodded his head and gave her a crooked smile, "Well you know I'm always down for doing something foolish." And that was true for the most part, at least when it was about something that made him angry. He was an incredibly rash and foolish person when something really made him mad. And he wasn't even mad, he was livid. Matt nodded once again, "Well it was just an idea. It would be someone who could bring something to the table that no one else probably could. I mean my dad knows Dark magic but he would never use it. And well, no offense, but most people who go to You-Know-Who are cowards." It was true but Matt hoped he hadn't upset her by agreeing with her that her uncle was a coward. Most were just going to go play with the biggest bully on the playground just to make sure they weren't a victim or that someone they cared about wasn't one. He smiled as she nestled closer to him and he tightened his arm around her and put his head on top of hers, "Neither would I. That's why I'm not going to let this go without a fight." And he kissed the top of her head before staring up into the sky, wondering just how much longer it would be until something would be done.

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana gazed at Matt, her hazel eyes catching his for a long moment. He was partially right in his statement, her possible arranged marriage did involve him to an extent, but it was so much more than that. Somewhere during their friendship, Alana knew she had fallen in love with Matt. And now that she had him, she was definitely not going to let her bloody father take him away- no matter what! All of her life she had thought she was a loser, a freak of nature, someone who wasn't good enough or worthy enough to be happy, but Matt showed her how wrong she was to believe that rubbish. she did deserve to be happy and she was only truly happy when she was with him. She would be damned if her father took away the only happiness and love she had in her life. "I will not let him marry me off. No matter what I have to do or where I have to run to, I won't let it happen." her tone was soft but fierce. "I refuse to lose you now that I have you." she turned her eyes away from his and stared out at the open field. "I'm not letting him take my happiness away. Again." She turned her head to catch his playful glare and she smirked at him half-heartedly, "I can't hex you every time your ego gets out of control? You're no fun." she joked.

Family. Sure, she had one, but it wasn't full of love and warmth and happiness like Matt's family was. Her family was the epitome of hate and anger and violence and greed- everything one comes to despise in life because they can never fill the void that is inside you To be considered a part of his family made her feel whole. She knew it was where she belonged, where she would always belong. Alana smiled, "I know you're here to the end. You've pretty much proved that already. And you're all the more wonderful for it." She could tell his ego was probably being stroked right now, but she didn't mind it. It was the truth. Alana chuckled a bit at his next statement, "You? Up for doing something foolish? Never! Not the book-smart Ravenclaw! That just defies belief." she teased him, winking. Alana listened to his thoughts on her Uncle and the help he might be able to offer. She decided she would owl him and at least ask. The worst he could do was say no. She nodded her head at Matt in agreement, most of You Know Who's followers were cowards, that's why they followed him. She had called her Uncle as much to his face. With Matt's arm wrapped around her and his head on hers, Alana felt herself relaxing into a familiar safety and warmth she had come to associate with Matt. It was nice. And she never did want it to end. If they were going to be happy together, they were going to have to face her father. There was no question about it now, she had resigned herself to dueling. She sighed, "I think a fight is what it's going to come down to be. I don't really see any other choice anymore."

[Matt Roberts]

Their eyes connected for a moment, hazel eyes looking into hazel eyes. He knew that he had practically the same eye color as hers but there was just something different. Hers just held something more beautiful than his could ever have and he wished that he knew what it was but he just couldn't put his finger on it. He just knew that he could stare at them for an eternity and never tire from it. Her eyes were more mysterious than his own, they held secrets and a dark past that his would never hold. Her eyes were expressive but not to the amount that his were, he wished his could hold secrets like hers seemed to. But unfortunately all the beauty in the world wasn't enough to keep Matt's mind at ease. He was still at risk of losing the best thing that had ever happened to him. Her father could marry her away or at least try to make her. He knew that he would do anything to help her escape from that, if not for himself, for her. She wouldn't be happy that way, he truly believed that no one on this good green earth could make her happier than he could. And he would make sure to prove that to her. He was glad that she seemed to be looking at the situation like he was. "And you know I'll be with you every step of the way. If you have to run all the way across the world I'll be right there beside you. I won't let your father control your life and I won't let him take you away from me. Now I can't imagine you and I being any other way than the way that we are now." His voice was just as fierce as hers and he meant every word and he wanted to make sure that she knew that. He scowled, "Wipe that Slytherin smirk off your face. Its incredibly unbecoming. And no you can't hex me every time my ego gets out of control. Geez woman, I would never be able to walk again." He was glad they could still tease at tense moments like these but at the same time he felt like he was avoiding more important situations. Where had all his fun nature gone? He didn't know.

He was trying to imagine what kind of person he would be if he didn't have the family that he had. Without his father, he wouldn't be as intelligent or logical or driven as he was now. He would have no one that he truly looked up to and aspired to be. He wanted nothing more than to be the man that his father was. Without his mother he wouldn't have his stubbornness, he wouldn't have someone who pampered him and made him feel like he was being taken care of. He wouldn't have someone who made him laugh and someone to debate with, someone who challenged him and made him into a stronger and better person, someone who had taught him to love with all his heart and not to be afraid of emotions. Without Mallory, he shuddered at the thought of his life without his little sister, it was a horrifying thought. Without Mallory he wouldn't know how to live his life with passion, he wouldn't know what it meant to care about someone so much that he would literally die on the spot for her. Of course he felt this way about Alana but he'd always felt that way about Mallory, ever since she was born. Without Mallory, he'd be empty. She was pretty much his other half when it came to most things, they were an unbreakable duo. Alana had none of that. How different would she have been if she had been born into his family? He laughed, "Oh now you know you're just making my ego grow even larger. And to think you'd want to hex me everytime my ego swelled. Why you're the cause of it most of the time, don't you think that would just be a little bit unfair?" He rolled his eyes at her, she knew him better than that. He faced a lot of situations logically but when he was angry there was no telling what he would do next. And for as logical and rational as he could be, he was still a very spontaneous boy and once he set his mind to doing something, no matter how stupid or rash it was, he normally stuck to his guns. "You know me better than that. Of course i'm still the all-knowing wonderful Ravenclaw who doesn't do a lot of foolish things but when I'm angry, I'm angry. And right now, I'm beyond angry." He said this with a more upbeat tone to keep the bantering up but at the same time he couldn't help but grit his teeth. He was pissed and he felt like he was avoiding situations again. Even with the most beautiful girl in his arms snuggled up next to him, he still had to try and focus on reality. When he was with Alana everything seemed so surreal, it still didn't feel like it was really happening. It was all too good to be true. Matt was surprised that now she had said dueling was the only answer, he tightened his arm around her, "Its up to you. You know I'm down for a duel but I want to make sure its what you really want before my mind gets out of hand with all the planning."

[Alana Starbeck]

Alana wished she knew what Matt was thinking as they stared into each others eyes. His sharp hazel gaze was cutting right through her, like it always had done, but now it held a hint of something else in it. Confusion? Insecurity? She just didn't know. She vaguely wondered what her eyes looked like to him. Could he see her memories, her fears, her hopes and dreams? Or did he just see the ugly hazel color she always saw when she looked at her reflection? Sometimes she wished she knew legillimency. Obviously, if she asked, he would probably tell her what he was thinking, but what fun was that? And she knew he wouldn't tell her everything he was thinking- that's where the skill would really come in handy. What would it be like to be inside his mind for just a moment? She flushed slightly, what would he think if he could see inside hers? He would probably break his wand. Again. Alana blushed deeper at his words. He sounded like he wanted to spend forever with her, and she would be lying if she said she didn't want that as well. She leaned in and kissed him full on the mouth, a soft, gentle kiss, but full of her gratefulness and love for him. She gave him an embarrassed smile as she pulled away from the kiss. Could she ask for anyone better than Matthew Roberts? She didn't think so. His teasing remarks brought her out of her dream-like state and she huffed at him in response. "My smirk is incredibly becoming on me. You know you secretly adore it. And as for hexing you, it wouldn't be walking that you would have a problem with." she gave him an evil smile. Alana would rather hex his mouth closed than anything else, but she would let him think whatever he wanted to about her comment.

Matt seemed to be lost in his own thoughts for a few moments and she let him be. They both had a lot on their minds and while it was good to talk things through, sometimes one just needed to be alone with their thoughts. She closed her eyes and let the cool breeze caress her. It was a gorgeous night out, but the weather was starting to become chillier and chillier. In a few months it would start snowing and then Winter break would be upon them. She wondered what she would do for break. Maybe she could talk to Slughorn and he could give her permission to stay here at Hogwarts. She'd rather spend her holiday here than at home. She shivered at the thought of going home to that cold, lifeless family of hers. Alana would not be returning there for this holiday break, not if she had a choice. She also had to figure out what to get Matt for Christmas. He was impossible to shop for; he already owned every book ever written and Mallory and his parents always got him everything else he needed. Alana knew he liked to write, so maybe she could get him an engraved quill and ink set with a fancy journal. That might be nice, as long as he didn't already have one. She sighed internally, why was she worrying over this right now, there were still a few months to go before Christmas. His voice broke her train of thought and she smiled up at him from his shoulder where her head was resting. "Of course it's not fair, but it is entertaining." she chuckled. Her laughter died down at his next comment. They both were angry and tense and frustrated because they had a huge problem to solve and there was no solution to be had- other than the one she really hadn't wanted to take. And even though she was angry, frustrated, hurt, scared and so many other various emotions, when she was in Matt's arms like this, everything felt perfect. She didn't care about her past, didn't worry about her future, she just enjoyed the now and how absolutely wonderful it all was. But, she knew that feeling couldn't last forever, at least not while her father still breathed. Alana sighed. She didn't really want to duel. Well, part of her did and part of her didn't. But, it was the only option available to them right now. She just hoped that they wouldn't get in trouble with the Ministry, or, in the worst case scenario, that they didn't die in the process. "I will write to my Uncle and ask him for his help. We will fight." her voice sounded resigned. It was the only way now.

[Matt Roberts]

Matt was stuck in this surreal world with Alana, and as much as he appreciated it and wanted to let himself immerse in this world, he knew that he couldn't let himself become naive once again to everything that was happening in the harsh world of reality. As easy as it would be to escape, to hold hands with Alana and skip through a meadow with bright sunlight and not a drop of darkness, it wasn't the right thing to do. The world which he had lived in all his life was a sunny world, a world where he believed if there was a drop of darkness, he could simply take an eraser and pretend that it never happened. Pretend that the good always conquered the bad. But was that realistic? He watched his father do just this but evil still existed. Evil still resided in the world. For some reason he thought of something one of the Slytherin boys had said during class one time, when they were talking about Dark wizards and the paranoia that came hand in hand with them. The boy's name evaded him for the moment, though he did believe his first name was Landon, though he couldn't be sure. All he could remember was thinking that it was very strange for a Slytherin to say something like that. He had said that everyone needed to stop being scared, that people only saw the darkness because they were taught to look for it, that as we grew up we were practically conditioned to look for it, to look for monsters, and that we looked for it everywhere, and that for as long as one continued to look for darkness we would always see it. The day that one stopped looking for monsters was the day that we would stop needing protection from the monsters, the darkness that entrapped our minds. Matt hadn't known how to handle it but now he thought about his words. He had always looked for darkness so that he could stop it but as he had looked for it he had missed the true darkness, he had missed the darkness in his best mate that had been beside him all along. Perhaps if he hadn't been so obsessed with fighting the dark, with fighting bad, he may have been able to see it all the better. He ran his free hand through his hair, leaving it poking up in some places, his mind was becoming one of the darker places lately. He was almost scared to leave himself alone to simply think because his thoughts were on the brink of sounding like an unstable person's. He looked at Alana and couldn't imagine how anyone would have the heart to harm her in any way. How could someone do that to someone so good, someone so pure? Matt would make sure that she would always know just how wonderful of a person she was, despite of anything she was told while she was growing up. He kissed her back, the gentleness and softness of her kiss was much different than the harshness he felt inside of him, it soothed him. He smiled at her and leaned in closely towards her ear, "I want you to know that I do love you and I want you to know that you're the most wonderful person I've ever met. You always have been," he whispered, trying to make sure that she knew and understood what he was saying to its fullest extent. He laughed at her comments but he was no longer in such a teasing mood, he was very serious and that frightened him. He felt like he was simply visiting someone else's body and mind, that none of it was his own. He tried his best to act like his normal self, "Secretly adore a Slytherin smirk? While I do believe you've gone mental. Next thing you'll be telling me that I love a Hufflepuff! And what do you mean thats not what I'll have a problem with? Are you just going to put a silencing charm on me?" His retorts weren't what they normally were but it was as good as he could do at the moment. That bothered him.

Normally Alana and him could sit in silence until the end of eternity and he could still walk away feeling as though he'd just held the best conversation. However, on this day, he was frightened of thinking, of silence, of nothing going on but the twisted workings of his mind. He couldn't handle it. He just laughed at her comment and said nothing. Well, he wasn't really doing anything to help the silence. He felt like he was hearing a frightening story, one where he knew that he would have nightmares and it would be best for him to not listen to it, but where he was too fascinated with the subject matter to stop listening. He was getting to the point of being delusional. He straightened up in his seat, "So have you still been having nightmares? Or is the potion helping with that?" He gave her a concerned look and sincerely hoped they had stopped. He hoped that one day she wouldn't need the potion and she would be able to have a nightmare-less sleep. If truth be told he was having nightmares himself but this wasn't about him, this was about her. His jaw clenched as she said they would fight and he only really thought about what "they" meant. She was going to fight. Her father would more than likely make her his primary target. Matt couldn't bare that. "Well what if maybe you didn't fight unless you thought that you really had to come in and save our butts? I mean if your Uncle says he'll fight, couldn't me and him do it? You know that your father will come after you first, he's been coming after you all along, so wouldn't it make more sense to keep you as far out of the fighting as possible? I don't want to lose you, ever." He knew that she would probably be angry with him but he really couldn't handle the thought of losing her and she would be the primary target. Maybe her father would know he was Michael Robert's son, he would more than likely know who his father was, and maybe he'd go after him first. But did her father even know who he was? Who Matt Roberts was? He doubted it. "Your father wouldn't even know who I was would he?" He said this very darkly because that may have been the one thing that could have made him the primary target instead of Alana. If that was gone than all hope in that was too.