Questions, sort of a monoluge type thing very very

[BloodButterfly]

Do you ever lie? About your cuts? Do you ever feel bad about it, does it bother you? Or are you fine with it, completely ambivalint. [SP?] You're trying to save yourself from being hurt but the lies only end up turning around and hurting you. But no one can hurt you more than you've hurt yourself. Yesterday morning was the first time I fully understood that. Or can they?

You don't want them to worry which is why you protect them from seeing from knowing from believing. But you're also protecting yourself.

You barely know some people so why should you care what they think? Or how they feel. About you.

Try as we might we all care what people think on some level.

If they don't understand you don't connect with you why should you talk to them? Why?

That's how I am.

Or if they don't fit your mold. It's incredibly embarassing to realise this that this is who you are.

Certain people, know exactly what they want and who they are and what's right wrong. I'm not one of those people. I'm so mixed up inside.

I guess I kind of push people away which makes sense considering my past. I trust people but then...I don't.

I honestly don't know. I'm so confused I'm so mixed up. I'm so terribly embarassed.

I'm sorry.

[RetardFairy]

I used to, heck I probably will do when I end up cutting again. But I think it just complicates the situation even more. If someone's caught you at it, then theres nothing much you can do but give over....Meh it's very complicated.

XxX
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